Canada is a big country that is undoubtedly filled with prospects who, much like the provinces and territories, are all very different from each other but carry a unique charm that intrigues us.
Now I get it, you've made your rounds in the dating scene and you feel like you've dated EVERY. GUY. Amiright? You've tried Tinder and Bumble, you've even (dare I say it) went out to the local bar and tried wheeling.
So let me assume that in your many conquests you've definitely dated these 13 beaus. Whether it was a long term relationship with The Nature Boy or a summer fling with The Fisherman, read below and let me know how many provinces and territories have treated you to dinner or more...
British Columbia - The Stoner
Occupation: Real Estate Agent's assistant. Rolls weed at the dispensary on Fridays.
Hobbies: Hiking with his dog. Hitting up the VAG. Checking out DJ shows on Saturday night.
Looking for: Chill chick, 4/20 friendly who supports his passion for the environment.
Probably named: Jamie
Alberta - The Cowboy
Occupation: Works on the rig seasonally.
Hobbies: Drinking Budweiser. Maintaining his truck.
Looking for: Someone who he can take to Stampede. Must own a pair of cowboy boots. Must love beer.
Probably named: Taylor
Photo cred — michy_michy
Saskatchewan - The Junior A Hockey Player
Occupation: Moose Jaw Warrior (centre forward).
Hobbies: Practice. Gym. Practice. Vodka. Family. The family dog.
Looking for: His high school sweetheart. Someone he knows isn't just with him for when he gets drafted to the 4th line of some NHL team.
Probably named: Patrick (Pat)
Manitoba - The Husband
Occupation: A cop.
Hobbies: Playing pick-up hockey on the frozen lake with his buddies. Chopping fire wood. Loving his family.
Looking for: A WOMAN who wants to have babies, like yesterday. Wants to lock down a wife so he can 'complain' about her at the force with his buddies.
Probably named Troy.
Ontario - The Fvck Boy
Occupation: Expo at Cactus Club and really proud of it.
Hobbies: Telling people how tall he is. Hanging out at Rebel. Counting his tips.
Looking for: Arm candy. Must live in heels. Hopefully works at a nightclub and can get him on the guest list.
Probably named: Kyle
Quebec - The Ghoster
Occupation: Works at a boutique in the Saint-Roch district.
Hobbies: Chain-smoking. Doing what he wants to do. Always trying to break away from the group.
Looking for: Someone who will let him be a lone "loup". Someone he can share a poutine with. Someone who won't be disappointed if/when he ultimately doesn't call back.
Probably named: Francis but goes by Francois
Yukon - The Nature Boy
Occupation: Tree planter.
Hobbies: Saving the Earth.
Looking for: Someone he can recruit to tree planting. Must have dreadlocks. Must use patchouli oil as perfume.
Probably named: Arrow
Northwest Territories - The Climber
Occupation: Wherever the wind takes him. (Freelance programmer).
Hobbies: Climbing, bouldering, chess, word puzzles, sudokus.
Looking for: A free spirit who laughs at their own jokes. Someone who's down for an adventure but can also help build a bonfire in a pinch.
Probably named: Adam
Photo cred — hanna torkelsen
Nunavut - The Future Olympian
Occupation: Cross-Country Skiier
Hobbies: Skiing. That's all.
Looking for: An early riser who can keep up on the slopes. Someone who knows how to make a breakfast that isn't too heavy but filling at the same time.
Probably named: Mason
Newfoundland - The Friend
Occupation: Some kind of customer service job.
Hobbies: Doing whatever you want to do. Always up for hanging out with your girl friends. Plays you original songs on his acoustic guitar.
Looking for: Anyone who won't put him in the friend-zone.
Probably named: Flynn
Nova Scotia - The Fisherman
Occupation: Works as a deckhand on a crabbing boat.
Hobbies: Chewing on tobacco. Reading War and Peace. Dreaming about the Atlantic whenever he's on the shore.
Looking for: Someone doesn't mind the smell of fish and who wants to go sailing. All. The. Time.
Probably named: William but goes by Red for some reason...
Photo cred — naditta
New Brunswick - The Farmer
Occupation: Works on his parent's farm. Hopes to own it in 10 years.
Hobbies: Sleep? I guess?
Looking for: A sturdy girl who can lift at least 40 pounds or as he likes to call it "baby hall barrels".
Probably named: Peter
Prince Edward Island - The Chef
Occupation: Paramedic but only because his family wants him to be.
Hobbies: Cooking lobster. Competes in the clam-bake contest every summer. Makes the best crab cakes of your life.
Looking for: A foodie without a shellfish allergy.
Probably named: Landon
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