I make no claims to having the perfect body. To put it simply and honestly: I do not. But I do try to stay healthy and strong and that to me that means trying be at the gym as frequently as I can make myself go. I am in awe of people who can go hard everyday of the week... you rock! I am not one of them.
That being said, I have been a keen observer of all those around me at my 2-3 times a week sessions. Anyone has a right and a drive to make their bodies healthy and because of that, there are so many types of people at the gym. I have found a bit of myself in all of the types listed below.
Even though they can be quirky and at times, just plain irritating, we are all peeling ourselves away from the Mindy Project on TV and aching our muscles in a stationary position to improve our bodies. That is universally admirable! Here are the 10 types of people you'll see at a Vancouver gym:
1. The Selfie Queen/King.
They are at the gym. THEY ARE AT THE GYM. If you didn't see it in person, be sure to check their twitter, Instagram, Facebook and Snapstory for verification. The Selfie Queen/ King comes in varying levels of fitness but always looks like a an expert on their various social media. Can they even burn calories without the snapchat dog filter? Who knows.
2. The Elliptical Mom/Dad.
This stressed out parent has finally found time to hit the gym. Their busy schedule is infused with cranky kids who will most probably call them at least once through this venture. Their machine of choice is always the elliptical which they seem to use with a jolly diligence that cannot be found in any other gym being. Find them after their cardio session doing some high-school stretches on the mats and squinting through their email.
3. The Hiking God/Goddess.
Envision them hiking up one of Vancity's picturesque trails, their hair flowing in the wind. Instead, you see them miserably power walking on an uphill treadmill or solemnly stepping on the step machine, wishing they were outside. This nature-loving being has been pushed into the gym due to the city's frequent rain.
4. The Fashionista.
This gym being is always dressed to impress. Whether it's a pair of colourful patterned lulu lemons or a confusingly criss-crossed sports bra, they always look intensely high fashion. Don't even get me started on the shoes. Your 7 year old, browning Nikes will look like crap next to the Fashionista's amped up kicks.
5. The Angry Weight Lifter.
This guy makes a face of ultimate rage every time he lifts his way-too-heavy-weights. His expression is the climax of any thriller scene. After he lets go, you will often hear an irritable grunt. Most of the time, the Angry Weight Lifter will have to take a walking break to calm himself down until he is ready to try again.
6. The "Friends."
This group of annoying teens has decided to make going to the gym a social gathering. They stretch together, cardio together and compete with each other. Find them messing around on the weight lifting machines, or attempting group stretches on the mats. Either way, they are the perfect example of how less is sometimes more.
7. The Serious Trainee.
This unfit gym being has decided to put their body's transformation into the hands of an expert. Find them frequently arguing with their trainer about how many sit ups are left to go or staring at dismay at their next task in hand (a backflip handstand push up.) Sometimes you find yourself listening in and taking pointers from their session. Hey, you can't give up free advice.
8. The Stretchastic Mr./Mrs. Elastic.
This gym being puts your almost bridge pose to shame. They spend their time doing crazy yoga-bordering-on-circus poses in their perfectly fitted stretch pants. After the body moulding extravaganza, watch them melt into a relaxing state of meditative breathing. Their gym experience looks miles apart from your sweaty, hating-yourself, when-are-we-gonna-be-done, time.
9. The Profuse Perspirer.
This person looks like they've either ran a marathon or just gone for a swim, you can't quite tell. Gym disinfectant takes on a new meaning when they've used a machine before you.
10. The Average, Lets-Get-Off-The-Couch, Joe.
This gym being is the one I relate with most. We're here to procrastinate with some benefit to our bodies. Some days you will find us working our bootys, some days you will see us sweating through the plank and other days, you will just see us jogging on the treadmill at an average pace. We're not aiming to be models, just to not let the world know how much ice cream we truly eat.
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