As a UBC student, you're probably dreading the return to the construction that is blocking every short cut you have ever known to class, the caffeine fuelled all-nighters trying to hand in an assignment on WebWork or Connect, the ever rank, over-crowded 99 bus ride back to school. Sigh, the struggle is so real.
But maybe, just maybe, if you follow these 19 golden rules of things you should never do at UBC, you might just make it to next summer.
1. Take a course without going on Rate My Professor first
You could either end up with an awesome professor who's a chill marker, flexible with deadlines and cracks a couple funny jokes during lecture. Or....get stuck buying a G-pen writing a final you know you're going to fail.
2. Wait until the last second to register for classes
Speaking of registering for classes, seriously, don't leave it till the last minute. You probably won't get a spot in the class. Make sure you've done your research and made a time table in advance so you can hit that register button 0.001 seconds before your almost classmate.
3. Go to school without layering up
Summer is the probably the only season where this rule doesn't necessarily apply. But during all other seasons, UBC has its own climate. Vancouver says it's 18 degrees, UBC says it's 5.
4. Go to school without an umbrella
5. Underestimate the amount of time it takes to walk to the bus loop
Five minutes? Probably more like 13. UBC campus is huge. Don't catch yourself missing the last bus and getting stranded at school after six long, tedious hours of classes.
6. Buy your textbooks at the UBC Bookstore
The seniors on campus have probably already told you: never pay full-price for your textbooks. Just get them at the discount bookstore at the Village or buy them off someone through a UBC textbook group on Facebook. Same goes for your clicker.
7. Go to the Timmy's next to Sauder
Your 10 minute break between classes is already up and you've only made it half way through the line up. Honestly, just grab a Starbucks from the old sub.
8. Buy your breakfast, your lunch, and your dinner at the Nest
Okay, we get it. You've probably just spent an all-nighter at Irving and really need to grab a bite. This is permissible. But let's be honest, you're a broke ass student and you're probably counting on your dwindling bank account to fund your next Pit night right? Try to avoid overpaying for food at school...unless it's waffle fries.
9. Leave your study spot at Irving
You won't get it back.
10. Study with your friend at the Learning Commons at Irving
You will not get anything done. Try the Ridington Room or Chapman Learning Commons.
11. Better yet, don't even study at Irving
It's finals season and, 101% guaranteed, you will not find a spot to study at IKB. Try going to Allard Hall, Scarfe, Woodwards, or if you're willing to go the distance, Forestry.
12. Expose your secret study spot
Once you've found your highly confidential perfect study spot, don't tell anyone.
13. Pull an all-nighter alone
You will probably hate yourself after your all-nighter cram session. At least with a friend, you'll hate yourself a little bit less. You'll also probably fall asleep without their moral support.
14. Park at school
Parking at UBC costs like $1,000,000,000/hr. Park along the residential streets near school for free like Alma or Blanca, and just bus the rest of the way.
15. Walk to UBC Village
Why walk when you can just take the 99. #jknotjk
16. Hook up with anyone at FROSH
Because you probably did, and now you regret it.
17. Wear a sweater from another university
You will be judged.
18. Speak of SFU
Refer to #17.
19. Graduate UBC without making the most out of it
School is tough, but don't let that get in the way of you having an amazing experience. Join clubs, go on exchange, storm the wall, maybe even agree to go to Wreck Beach for once. UBC is a phenomenal school with many chances to learn and to grow, a place of mind that could lead you towards a path into an unexpected opportunity.
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