Let's face it, people love to say that Ottawa isn't the most exciting city in the world. Declared a government city, the only people who find this city remotely exciting are tourists who adore the view. But most of the residents here just complain non-stop about nothing and everything. Here are a few examples along with some decent compliments.
1. "Sorry I can't make it to your birthday downtown. I live in Barrhaven."
The traveling time from Barrhaven to Downtown Ottawa is longer than you would actually spend downtown.
Stop trying to make 'Twa happen. It's not going to happen.
3. "There are so many places to choose from to celebrate my birthday!"
Said no one ever. You're either stuck with drunk 18 year olds, or creepy overaged men who are balding.
4. "It's so warm out!"
You'll only ever hear when it's above 20 in the summer and below -10 in the winter.
5. "Let's go to Broadways tomorrow morning so I can puke my brains out in the bathroom... again."
Okay, maybe no one actually says the last part but it definitely happens way more than you'd think.
6. "I'll be late. OC Transpo didn't show up."
Which is the typical winter, spring, summer and fall excuse.
7. "Did you know Cristina Yang grew up here?"
And by Cristina Yang, we obviously mean Sandra Oh from Grey's Anatomy.
8. "Are you going downtown on Canada Day or are you staying sane?"
Probably not in those exact words, but we all know the first question always leads to thinking the second.
9. "Wanna take a girls trip to Montreal or Toronto this summer?"
And the answer is always yes. Get us out of this city and then remind us why we love it when we come back.
10. "I don't know her/him but I know the name."
You'll hear this especially if you're from Barrhaven or Kanata.
11. "I'm over Starbucks. I recently got really into Bridgehead!"
Aka, I'm a snob, and definitely want you to envy me for no reason.
12. "No one cool ever comes here."
Meaning concerts, and you'll hear this from every single person in Ottawa. We don't always want to drive to Toronto or Montreal for a concert, you know?
13. "I wanna go to ______ but the there's so much construction!"
Aka to any of the malls in Ottawa at the moment, most roads, and most areas you want to visit.
14. "Did you hear we might be getting a Chipotle?!"
People in Ottawa are obsessed with the fact that we don't have Chipotle.
15. "I'm so over going out."
Probably because we all started going out with fake i.d's in Hull at the age of 16.
16. "What do you want to do this weekend? There's so many choices!"
Said no one ever. Really, ever.
17. "I need to go to Tomo to take a selfie in the bathroom."
Is it a bar, is it a restaurant? Not sure, I've only ever heard about their cool black and white bathroom.
18. "Wanna take a trip to Quebec? The beer is cheaper."
You'll mostly hear this around the holidays because obviously.
19. "We need to do yoga on Parliament Hill this summer!"
But seriously, everyone in Ottawa should do yoga on Parliament Hill this summer. It's beautiful.
20. "SO excited for the Bluesfest lineup this year!"
Usually this is actually true, but we'd all be lying if we said we knew 90% of the bands this year.
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