Ah yes, so. You're texting a guy you're seeing/dating/made out with once after last call. You had a great time whenever you last touched-tounges and you are low-key into it. Of course, you can't be together 24/7 or even 15/5, so you do what we all do - text.
Texting someone you're into can be complete and utter trash because of all the politics associated with online/virtual dating. How long do you wait before clicking send? What kind of emojis do you use? If you send a text at 2 a.m. is he going to magically appear on your door with pizza and lube? So many questions.
A big question we've all faced in our lives happens after we press send. Your message sits there, cute and well-crafted, only to be left unanswered. A couple minutes go by...then a couple hours...maybe even a couple days. You whip out your phone during brunch and face the screen to your friends:
"What the actual fuck. Why didn't he text me back?!"
Well sweetheart, I've got some news for you. There are a couple answers to this question that you may or may not be into. If anything of these ring a bell, stop hoping your phone will ring with his caller ID. It's okay, it's over, and you've got this bb.
1. He legitimately does not think you're into him
Not all dudes are wise in the ways of romance, especially via text. Remember, text messages don't have that cute flirty tone to your sarcasm. You can't shove him on the arm via iMessage. No one wants to keep chasing someone who seems uninterested. Read back your texts and see if anything sounds cold or moody. If yes, shoot off something fun and flirty that lets him know you are #down. If no? Read on.
2. The timing isn't right
You can take this two ways - 1. It is a legitimately bad time of day for him. If you're texting your bae at 7 a.m. post morning spin class, he is probably not going to respond to you as soon as he unlocks his phone. It's statistically proven that the highest volume of text time falls form 2 p.m. onwards, so wait till the afternoon before getting in your feels about this one. The second way is that...
3. He isn't ready to actually date
If your man drops off the face of the earth after 3-good dates? He is not ready to be anyone's man. This is not your problem. He is just a bit of a trash bag that dragged you along for a bit. Discard and carry on, babe.
4. You got ahead of yourself
You had a great time and you started thinking about what you should bring to his house for Christmas and where you guys should vacation but is he? Odds are, you were too heart eyes to really see how your date was going - which was not as amazing for him as it was for you. You don't wanna spend time with someone who's not as excited about your dates as you are, right? Is'okay doll.
5. You're not even close to being official yet
Harsh but true. Two amazing dates doesn't necessarily mean a bf/gf title is in your future, no matter how good your first name sounds with his last one. Two dates isn't really anything, even if you want it to be. Pace yourself.
6. He just wanted a one night stand
Which sucks if you thought this could be a more serious thing. Sometimes sex is just sex. And some dudes don't have the decency for a pity, "We should do this again!" text. Getting no message is also a message bbg.
7. He's seeing someone else
If you get the feeling that you might be splitting your time with him - you're probably right. We're in an age where people date lots of people, sometimes all at once. If you're not down for that, you definitely don't have to succumb to being "Tuesday Girl" in his phone.
8. He legitimately forgot
Life is busy!! And sometimes, we legitimately don't have the time to respond to texts. If he left you on read for a day, sure. He was literally busy and probably apologetic. If he left you on read for a goddamn week? GTFO of there girl. This dude is NOT thinking about you if seven days go by without you popping up once.
9. He is terrible at texting
His responses consist of "lols" "cools" and "sups" usually followed by some other dry ass word and perhaps the phrase "I hate texting lol." This is what I liked to call a "Snapchat Douche" that you really should not be pursuing anyways.
10. He doesn't know what to say
Either because there's a lull in the convo or he's just kind of confused at what's being said rn? If you were mid-convo and a certain topic throws him off, give him the day to message you again. If it's been more than a couple days, just let it - and him - go.
11. He's scared of something serious
You've been going on really great dates, having super good sex - things are all pointing in that green-light direction but whenever you get around the topic of your 'relationship' he kinda fades away. If he dodges more emotional texts or seems to back tf whenever you talk about 'where this is going' - get up and get out. You deserve someone who wants the same things you do - don't settle for anything less.
12. He's just not that into you
But he is a total dick. If someone can't gather up the balls to tell you "Hey, sorry but I don't see this as a long term thing." You shouldn't be wasting your time on someone that doesn't have the decency to tell you that something isn't working. This one is a blessing in disguise.
13. You are too fking good for him
Sometimes dudes can get hella intimidated by a girl who is out of their league. And that is fine. You don't need to be with someone who isn't confident in who they are and what they bring to the table.