Not to be dramatic but Muskoka is arguably the best place in the world, and every cottager with a place in Muskoka will probably agree. From the picturesque sunsets to the lakes ready for you to drive into, it's the perfect place to spend a Summer the Canadian way. If you spend your Summers in the Hamptons of the North then you'll definitely know these 16 facts to be true.
1. Going to Resort Nights on Mondays at Kee to Bala weekly.
Kee basically acts as the entire Toronto Entertainment District during the Summer.
2. Having to prepare a full on plan on how to avoid traffic during the drive up to cottage country.
"Ok if I leave at 2am on Thursday I don't think there will be any traffic."
3. Not having to worry about getting a fake tan because it comes naturally from all the time you spend on the dock.
Not today Snookie, not today.
4. Or spending 20 minutes every morning slathering sunscreen on yourself because your tan game is a joke.
Also not today Mr. Krabs, not today.
5. Waiting 400 years for ice cream at the new Sweet Jesus location.
Muskoka doesn't have nearly the population size of Toronto yet the wait time seems nearly identical UGH.
6. Still going to Mooskokas's for ice cream too because they were here first.
They may not have the crazy toppings Sweet Jesus has but you'll always have a soft spot for them.
7. Waiting 401 years for a table at Grand Electric.
*Stares into the souls of people who already have a table hoping they'll disappear*
8. Hitting up Wakestock in Bala.
the cute boys wake boarding, of course.
9. Feeling like a bad ass pulling up to the docks at Port Carling for a booze run.
The best booze runs are the ones done by boat.
10. Knowing at least one person working at Turtle Jacks this Summer.
"Yea don't worry we don't need a reservation my sister's friend works here!"
11. Knowing at least one person working at a golf course up north this Summer.
"Yea I'm a (insert: cart girl, grounds keeper, waitress) at the club!"
12. Your perfume/cologne of the Summer is bug spray.
Nobody has time for bug bites.
13. The lack of Uber is a SERIOUS struggle.
The mission back to the cotty post Kee would be 10x cheaper and easier.
14. You become a professional tuber/knee boarder/wakeboarder come June.
If there was an Olympic event for tubing, you'd get gold.
15. You wave to everybody you pass via boat.
And get seriously offended if they don't wave back.
16. Drinking at the fire pit > going out.
Clubbing is great but it doesn't hold a candle to roasting marshmallows with a glass of wine surrounded by your friends.
17. You spent at least one summer at Muskoka Woods.
Whether you were actually Christian or not, it was a LIT Christian camp.
18. It's your easiest hello and hardest goodbye.
The end of the Summer means the end of boat rides, tan days and nights by the fire pit. :(