Brunch - that lovely time of the week when you can gather your girl squad and get acceptably tipsy at 11 AM. It's fun, it's classy, and it's oh so instagrammable- until you have to work it. For any of you fellow servers out there that are stuck working the breakfast/ brunch shifts, I sympathize. We all know that brunch is just a code word for hell.
READ ALSO: The 32 Things That Annoy Your Server Most
The turn and burn game is as strong as the coffee, most servers have run a marathon by 1 PM, and the staff is guaranteed to leave wearing a full breakfast before the shift is up. It's not easy being a brunch server but there are just some things people do that make those AM shifts a whole lot worse.
If you want to be your server's favourite table and maybe get a nice comped dessert out of your brunch experience, just avoid doing these 21 things.
1. Asking for decaf coffee.
WHY?!? If you're not a pregnant woman we just don't get it.
2. Ordering items that are not on the menu or trying to create your own breakfast altogether.
I get that you want a crepe, oatmeal, one hard-boiled egg, and a leek omelette but we actually don't serve any of those things so please kindly order off the menu in front of you.
3. Making your server take 3 trips for ketchup, napkins, and salt rather than asking for them all at once.
We honestly have no problem getting you what you need but asking us every time we come back to the table for something else is really time consuming and annoying.
4. Asking for the dinner menu during brunch service.
No. Just no.
5. Proceeding to sit and wait at a table for the lunch/ dinner menu to start.
There is nothing worse than having a table that sits and waits for 45 minutes to an hour for the menu to switch over. Please just come back later and stop taking up seats that other people are patiently waiting for.
6. Copping an attitude because you weren't served 'real syrup' with your pancakes/ waffles/ french toast.
I get it, you're too good for Aunt Jemima. If we have real maple syrup in-house, I'll kindly get it for you, but you don't have to be rude about it.
7. Trying to modify your Eggs Benedict to something other than poached eggs.
Please don't do this... like ever.
8. Getting belligerently drunk off mimosas by 11:30 AM.
We can only legally start serving at 11 AM so if you're drunk by 11:30 AM, I'm judging.
9. Knocking on the door to get let in before the restaurant has even opened yet.
You might be desperate for coffee but NEVER DO THIS. We open when we open, and you trying to get in 10 minutes earlier because you see us setting up is just not going to happen. You'll just have to wait like everyone else.
10. Not knowing the way you want your eggs cooked.
It's a pretty standard question, so please have a pretty standard answer for us. Sunny, over easy, poached, scrambled all suffice. Things like, the way McDonald's makes it, is not a real answer.
11. Needing 36 coffee refills.
Can I just get you an IV drip of coffee while I'm at it?
12. When people ask for medium-hard poached eggs.
You can have it medium or hard - pick one. Asking the kitchen to accommodate something like this, will result in me getting my head chopped off, so please don't make me do it.
13. When you walk in with a party of 12 and get mad when you can't get sat.
Brunch is a busy time so call ahead if you can! And if you do have to wait don't take your frustration out on the hostesses and servers - they don't control how much space there is in the restaurant.
14. Morning people try and crack jokes or act smart when we've just opened for the day.
You've probably worked out, ran errands, and solved world hunger before 8 AM today but I'm not even really awake yet, so leave the clever banter for after the food's arrived.
15. Helicopter parents who ask insane menu questions about everything their kid's about to order.
I'm not sure if there are nitrates or red dye number 3 in the kid's classic breakfast but if there are, surely they'll be okay. All the other kids seem to walk out of there just fine.
16. Asking your server to be your photographer during the brunch rush.
You want a quick photo of your group to commemorate your morning out? No problem! You want us to do a full photoshoot with different angles, lighting, backdrops, and scenes? ... Yeah, we've got other things we need to be doing. Maybe bring a selfie stick next time.
17. Parents letting their kids run around like they're at a park.
I'm not sure if you've noticed but people are running around here with HOT plates. This is not the place to have your kids playing tag or soccer or just strolling around aimlessly.
18. Stopping everyone that's NOT your server to get you things.
If you really do need to stop someone, just ask them to bring your server over. If that person is free they'll be happy to help you themselves but otherwise, don't assume they aren't busy doing something else.
19. Changing your mind after your breakfast order has been punched in.
Breakfast foods are usually one of the fastest cooking items on any menu, we guarantee that after we've punched it in, it's already being made in the kitchen. If you change your mind by the time we come back with drinks... well let's just say the kitchen is NOT going to be happy.
20. People who FAKE ALLERGIES.
If you say you're allergic to eggs but order a side of hollandaise sauce, we WILL shit talk you in the kitchen. You're the kind of people that ruin it for everyone who struggles with real allergies.
21. The non-morning people who grunt and grumble at you because they haven't had their morning cup of joe yet.
Me: Hi my name is -
Me: And hello to you too.
At the end of the day, while brunch is one of those shifts where you pray for the best and hold on for dear life, it still had its fun moments. And hey the tips make any shift a whole lot better. Just do all us brunch workers a favor and keep the crazy requests to a minimum. Things might not always be running smoothly but we are trying our best.