Photo cred - urlalala

We know the sound all too well. We hear it on our way to work, on our way home, when we’re out running errands, and late at night when we’re dizzy from beer and pizza.

It’s the sound of the subway doors shutting. Sometimes a man or woman filled with reckless abandon pulls the door back open and squeezes inside. The doors close again, and we are on our way. Most of the time.

Unless of course there is a delay.

The doors close, trapping you inside. The temperature shifts from general irritation to homicidal. And here are a few things you start to think...

1. How are so many emergency alarms being pulled? I've never seen one pulled. Ever.


2. There should be a first class subway car.


3. It should serve tapas.


4. I wonder if that man is homeless or just looks homeless?


5. How can there be a delay at every station?


6. Now I'm so comfortable I don't want to get off. Can I sleep here? All night?


7. Would the man beside me mind if I rested my head on his shoulder?


8. It wouldn't be sexual.


9. It's not like he's good looking.


10. No one on this subway car is good looking.


11. Why does everyone look like a hired assassin?


12. Is there a bomb threat?


13. Am I going to be a hero today and drag somebody out of the subway rubble to safety?


14. Will this experience lead to a book deal which will then turn into a Hollywood blockbuster?


15. The movie will be called, 'Out of the Rubble'.


16. That's a stupid title.


17.  Hm. I have a stray hair on my leg will the person beside me mind if I pull it off and throw it in their direction?


18. Does the TTC really appreciate my patience? REALLY?


19. College station looks like King station.


20. Let's play count the Michael Kors bags.


21. Let's not.


22. I can't believe that grown man is wearing snow pants.


23. I wonder how long those deviled eggs in my fridge will keep for?


24. I bet that woman isn't wearing prescription lenses.


25. I wish we had sky trains.


Photo cred - The Button Machine

**Someone lost a limb in the making of this article

***#sorrynotsorry
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