8 Emotional Stages Of Moving Away From Home For The First Time
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
So you finally moved from your suburban/rural home to Toronto. It's a big city and it's totally understandable to be overwhelmed, especially if you're not used to the hustle and bustle. It's been a couple of weeks since school started and many of you TO newbies are probably still adjusting to life outside of home.
Homesickness is a real thing and is nothing to be ashamed of. No matter how bad ass you think you are, a part of you will always miss your friends, family and even your cat from your hometown.
Here are the 8 emotional stages of moving away from home for the first time:
You've mustered the strength to say your final goodbyes to your parents, and even started to keep yourself busy with redecorating your soon-to-be-decorated room. But once the day is over, all you want to do is retreat and take the first bus home. You suddenly feel really small and anxious, and feel like you are not going to survive an entire semester let alone a year in this foreign city.
That's completely natural. You're human and you're bound have heightened emotions especially when you're experiencing something as big as starting a new chapter of your life. Have a good a cry and go call you mom and tell her you love her - no one will judge you!
So you're finally all cried out and don't want to sound as pathetic as you did a week ago. "This is my dream city, I got this", you say. "I'm going to go out for a walk and make friends and I'm going to be ay-okay!".
Oh young padawan, don't kid yourself just yet. It's good to be optimistic but getting over homesickness is a process that most people don't just get over in one go. Rushing the process is just going to overwhelm you back to stage #1. Don't deny that you're still an emotional mess, but also don't hold yourself back from taking the necessary steps to get past it.
You've buried yourself in your room and are trying to distract yourself with Netflix marathons of Gossip Girl and endless Skype conversations with your bffs from home. But despite all of this you're still super bored. But at the same time you're still kind of missing home and aren't open to accepting this new city as home just yet. You gotta pull yourself out of this slump and stop bothering your friends who are also trying to get on with their lives. Distract yourself with what the city you're in has to offer and try to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
It's been about a month since you've moved in and you've made a couple of friends, you've been through the city, and you've even learned how to use the city's public transit. That's something to be proud of. You've probably visited home for the weekend already but now that you're back it's a lot easier since you're newly refreshed from that hometown visit.
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It's midterm season, and you are just way too busy hustling and juggling around everything there is know about business economics or the anatomy of a calculator to even think about missing home. By this stage of the game, the weight of all your school work is coming down and you are totally owning your reign as a student in this big city. You've gotten out of that slump and are totally in it to kill it-- that is, your grades and priorities. Look at'chuu being all busy and shit, you go girl!
6. All moved in
Ahhh, so midterms are done and there aren't any major assignments that have to be done in a while so of course you celebrate! You've established your ride-or-dies and you're well navigated around the city, so why not?
You still think about home every now and then but this city isn't so bad now that you think about it and now that your emotions are in check you've started to notice the really attractive people in your classes that you were blind to earlier. Bonus!
You love this city and are totally over moping around everything you've been really upset about earlier. You've accepted that this is where you want to be right now and have completely soaked in the good vibes that are now everywhere. Obviously nothing beats home, but you've started to accept this city as a second home.
8. Bye for now!
Whether it's that mid-year winter break or the end of the school year itself, you're actually going to miss this city. Yeah, I know... who would have thought! You've packed up your stuff and now you're going to have to wait awhile until you come back to your new home away from home.
I told you it won't be as bad as you thought it was! It's time to say your goodbyes and finally get your butt back home and make up for all the time you've missed.
BONUS! #9: "When do I go back???"
Never in a million years did you think you'd be saying that a year ago. But now you're restless at home and not only do you miss being productive but you kind of miss having your own private life away from your hometown. It's okay, you can admit it!
Congratulations, you've beat the effects of homesickness and have embraced it into a new chapter in your life! It's incredibly amazing to be open to opportunities such as going beyond your comfort zone and trying something new. It's definitely hard at first but it's true when they say that life begins outside your comfort zone.
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