It doesn't matter whether you've been in a relationship or not, odds are good that you've heard of the "honeymoon" phase. Essentially, this is the part of the relationship where you and your partner are head over heels in love, wanting to spend every waking moment together, and constantly gushing to anyone that will listen about how happy you are.
Admittedly, this part of a relationship is pretty awesome. You feel on top of the world, totally secure in your relationship, and just complete and total bliss 24/7. When the honeymoon phase ends though, and trust us, it will, it can be pretty tough. You can start to question things, and wonder if this relationship is even right for you at all.
According to Primer Magazine, the honeymoon phase lasts from anywhere between six months to one year, depending on each individual relationship. During this time, the two of you are getting to know one another, figuring out likes and dislikes, and constantly trying new things. Everything is fresh and exciting, and you feel like you can not get any better.
Your partner is constantly showering you with compliments, showing up at your door with surprises, cancelling plans with friends to be with you, etc. While these things are nice, and are usually what causes you to fall in love so quickly, the fact of the matter is that this behaviour is not sustainable in the long run.
For you and your partner to maintain that sort of intimacy, for months after the honeymoon phase is over is literally exhausting to even think about. If you try to, you run the risk of losing your individuality, and instead, just morphing into one single person within the relationship.
This happened to me in my current relationship, and if we're being honest, it was pretty hard. My anxiety overtook my mind and caused me to second guess everything. Ultimately though, I have no one to blame but myself, because like I mentioned earlier, the honeymoon phase energy isn't sustainable in the long run.
It was hard though, when suddenly all those little things my s/o used to do stopped happening so frequently, and it's easy enough to start to question whether someone really loves you or not when they stop showing it the way they once did. I found myself in a constant state of anxiety that rubbed off not only on my romantic relationship, but my other relationships as well.
After a lot of self-reflection, and good, open discussion with my boyfriend, friends, and family, I became stronger and more confident that the end of the honeymoon phase is not the end of the relationship. Just because things have changed and everything's not so shiny and new doesn't mean he loves me any less, he just shows his love for me in different, more real ways now.
If you're in a relationship and you're going through this change, just know that it gets better. Talk openly with your partner about what works for you, what you need, and how you like to be loved, and do the same for them. At the end of the honeymoon phase, things get REAL, and that's when you really find out if your love is truly meant to be.