The 9 Kinds Of Tim Hortons You’ll Visit In Your Lifetime
Have you been to all of them yet?!
Whether you're a fan of Tim Hortons or not these days, you've got to admit, the chain of coffee shops has played an iconic role in a lot of Canadians' childhoods. From grabbing breakfast on your way to a hockey tournament to morning coffee before work, everyone's enjoyed Tim Hortons at some point in their lives.
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Now with the franchise being as large as it is, boasting tens of thousands of locations across the country, not every Tim Hortons can be exactly the same. Rather, Tim Hortons locations can vary quite a lot within certain areas, depending on where they've been placed and what kind of crowd they attract.
You've probably noticed this whenever you venture out from your local Timmies. Tim Hortons locations seem to be one of the biggest franchises that sees such a diverse range of customers, which differs from location to location.
With the help of some Redditors, we created a list of the 9 kinds of Tim Hortons you'll cross paths with in your lifetime.
"The Highway Tim Hortons"
This kind of Tim Hortons is the location you see along the way to the cottage, a hockey tournament or any kind of road trip within Canada, really. The small locations are usually packed with people just as antsy as you are to get back on the road, or customers who look like they're about to keel over if they don't get a cup of coffee for their long drive ahead. The line up to use the bathroom here is also a nightmare.
"The Golden Tim Hortons"
The 'Golden' Tim Hortons is the kind of Tims where the average customer age is 60. For some reason, certain Tim Hortons locations seem to attract old people and only old people. The kind of people who plan to stick around long enough to actually use those ceramic Tims mugs for their coffee. I've only seen employees give those mugs to customers maybe once in my life.
"The High School Tim Hortons"
The high school Tim Hortons starts out as the best Tims and turns into the worst Tims. When you're in high school, it's great because you're able to grab something to eat and drink in between class easily and see some friends along the way. But, the second, and I mean the second you get out of high school, you'll avoid it like the plague.
Why? Because it turns into a hub for awkward run-ins with people you don't talk to anymore, and people who think high school was the peak of their lives. To the point where they spend their Friday nights revving their Honda Civic in the store's parking lot. Not a good scene.
"The Biker Tim Hortons"
Tim Hortons seems to be the place to get coffee if you are a biker gang. Naturally, biker gangs like to make sure everybody knows they're in a biker gang by parking all their motorcycles out front and then drinking their coffee while leaning on the wall outside - right by the entrance. So they can make sure to stare down every person walking inside, of course.
"The Tim Hortons on Campus"
As a university or college student, there is no other Tim Hortons that you need to coordinate your life around more than one on campus. From the ridiculously long lineups to just the general chaos of a Tim Hortons placed right beside a massive lecture hall, if you want to get anything from one of these Tim Hortons locations, you've got to arrive at least 15 minutes before you actually want a coffee in your hand.
"The Useless Tim Hortons"
Everybody knows a useless Tims. Their panini press is always "already cleaned so they can't use it," the Ice Capp machine is always "broken," and it feels as if the employees will listen to your order and then actively screw it up just because they can.
"The Tim Hortons/Cold Stone Creamery Locations"
Do these things even still exist? At one point, Tim Hortons randomly thought it would be a good idea to team up with an ice cream place, which resulted in just an absolute mess of an order pick-up zone. Because, why not? Who doesn't love ice cream with their morning coffee?
Most of the locations containing Cold Stone Creameries no longer exist, so clearly the concept wasn't a hit. In smaller towns, though, a few are still standing and chugging along.
"The 'Local' Tim Hortons"
This Tim Hortons is easily one of the worst. Usually, these are the larger locations with big parking lots and later hours that can accommodate people who bring lawn chairs - so they can hang out with people in the parking lot at night. Using the drive-thru at this kind of Tims is extremely annoying, considering you have to proclaim your order to a literal audience while you're just trying to shamelessly order a muffin at 2 in the morning.
"The Hockey Tim Hortons"
These Tim Hortons are always right by an arena of some sort and get especially rowdy during tournament season. The usual crowd here consists of way too many people wearing hockey jerseys and a lot of hockey mom cliques whining about their kid getting benched for the second game in a row.
"The Tim/Wendy's Locations"
These locations are a special kind of rowdy. While Tim Hortons, the iconic Tim Horton's/Wendy's locations that we've all grown up with still exist to this day. Here, you get twice the amount of customers and double the options. So, naturally, you end up ordering a Wendy's burger with your Tims coffee. Every single time.