The University of Toronto is internationally recognized as one of the most intense research and educational institutions in the world. However, that doesn't mean that the students and professors are all work and no play. Here's a few lines of what lightens up our sometimes dull lectures and tutorials - from the professors themselves.


1. From making uncalled-for innuendos...

"I think this board needs Viagra - it won't stay up."

- Professor Bentz, CIV214

"If any of you females are interested in getting mated, you should raise your hand. I'm sure we can find someone to accommodate you."

- Professor Thomson, BIO120


2. To being faithless to our home city teams.

"I am a huge Maple leafs fan, but leafs fans always have a backup team."

- Professor MacDonald, RSM321


3. And using great descriptions to clarify concepts...

"Sorry guys, I have a scratchy throat... So every three minutes, I'm going to sound like I hit puberty."

- Professor Innocente, SOC100

"You can't kill a sine function, it just keeps wiggling."

Professor Stangeby, MAT194


4. But also giving the truth to students, plain and simple.

"University College was designed in such way to frustrate humans and cause distress."

- Professor Vervaeke, PSY100

"Don't email me with questions because I won't reply. I don't even reply to my girlfriend."

Professor Gunning, CHM243


5. From saving lives...

"I have no problem failing engineers. When you fail engineers, you save lives. I'm a hero."

- Professor Holden, MAT137

"I'm going to build my own theme park with blackjack and hookers."

- Professor Bender, APS104


6. Yet still managing to stay humble and kind to students.

"I'm so much more handsome than all of you. I need to be put in the Abercrombie and Fitch catalogue right now!"

- Professor Morgan, PSY240

"I'm just like Homer Simpson. Fat, yellow, and bald."

Professor Kee, PSL300

"We'll make a deal: if you laugh at my jokes, I won't laugh at your exam answers."

Professor Smyth, HIS103

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