15 Summer Struggles Of Being Pasty AF
I'm basically glowing.
Don't get me wrong, all skin tones are beautiful. Although it's hard to argue that most people prefer to get a tan in the warmer months.
To all those people who spend a day out in the sun without sunscreen, and come home with a gorgeous bronze tan, I envy you. I am part of the pasty club, and I'm proud to represent those who bath in SPF 1000.
For those of you with awkward sunburns and freckles galore, I feel your pain. No for real, I physically have one burnt shoulder right now and it is very uncomfortable. Remember the sunscreen my porcelain peers, summer has just begun.
1. White Themed Parties
For most "white" parties are an opportunity to wear all white and show off your glowing tans and gorgeous skin tones. For the pasty people population, these parties are just a way of accenting how much the sun hates us.
It is almost impossible to find a foundation that matches your skin colour. Then there is hoping that it does not break out your sensitive skin.
3. Flash Photography
Good selfie lighting gets a little trickier when you're skin is constantly over exposed.
4. "Are you sick?"
Many people associate a paler complection with being sick. The amount of times I have been asked "You look pale, are you feeling okay?" is ridiculous.
5. Friends constantly comparing their tans to your skin
Once summer roles around everyone flocks to patios and pools to soak up the sun. You end up being the ultimate "before and after" comparison. Your friends constantly put their arms alongside yours to point out how tanned they are. COOL.
6. You laugh at the thought of anything under SPF 50 actually working
To be honest, I was not even aware that SPF 10 was a thing until last weekend.
7. If you get even a hint of a tan, it is completely put to shame by a swarm of freckles.
But let's be real, freckles are pretty cute. This is where the pasty people come out on top!
8. The "nude" clothing trend
A nude body suit can be super flattering on most skin tones. Sadly "nude" is usually a perfect tan shade, AKA not us.
9. Constantly receiving the nickname "Casper"
Oh, because ghosts are white?!?! WOW. lol, haha, lmao, rofl.
10. Fake tan is an art form that you have yet to master
I swear some girls kill it with a fake tan. I am personally in the stage of "I missed the back of my leg, I'll just wear jeans".
11. Nude tights are fun because they actually give you a little colour.
Look guys, my legs don't match the wedding decor this time!
13. When you get a zit your face looks like the Japanese flag
That porcelain complection only accentuates the red mountain growing on your chin. CUTE.
14. You don't need highlight to glow
Realistically your skin reflects the light pretty well anyways.
15. You suck at any activity involving black lights
You have a serious disadvantage in lazer tag, your skin is a dead giveaway.