30 Things You'll See On Any Toronto University Campus At Any Given Time
You know it to be true.
Photo cred- clemsonunivlibrary
As Torontonians we tend to think of our city as the nucleus of Canada, heck maybe even the world. We think highly of the city, of its people and of its academia and rightfully so- we. smart. humans. yaaay.
The thing about Toronto university campuses is that they are predictable; incredibly and dependably, without fault, predictable. You can stumble onto any campus across the city's downtown core and find some of, if not all, the following. Consider it a Bingo card of sorts.
1.Xanax Prescriptions
I have anxiety, I swear.
2.Because I Am A Girl
Do not make eye contact, Do not make eye contact, Do not make eye contact, DAMMIT!
3.Outdated Professors
Usually look like they should've retired before we were born, probably shouldn't be teaching me how to use the internet.
4.Tim Horton's
Caffeine is crack. Tim Horton's is Canadian crack.
5.Text & Walk Failures
If you can't do it without getting in our way, don't do it all. We will punch you in the back of the head.
6. Crying
Because University is hard and apparently it's frowned upon to bring your mom with you.
7. Indie Coffee Cups
It's important to keep up appearances by carrying a trendy cup from a trendy local coffee shop.
8.Burrito Wrappers
Students need to eat and when it comes to food to fuel our brains, Burritos always place first.
9.Excuse Making
'My dog ate my homework, I swear' 'I really wanted to contribute to the group project but I fell down an elevator shaft' 'Sorry, I had to drink beer last night'
10.People Inappropriately Dressed For The Weather
Tip: When it gets cold, don't wear a muscle tank bud Tip 2: Don't wear uggs in September, or ever.
11. Yelling
I CAN'T FIND MY NOTES, WHO TOOK MY NOTES?!
12.Macbooks, Macbooks & More Macbooks
Ew, who owns a PC anymore?
13.Complaining, So Much Complaining
'Why haven't we gotten our marks back yet? We wrote the test like 14 whole minutes ago' 'What is even the point of this assignment?' 'Waaaaaaaaaah'
14.Lost and/or Keen First Years
Still getting used to the big city, can't hold their liquor, attend one hour tutorial classes, you get the point.
15. Athletic Bros.
Ryerson Rams, U of T Varsity Blues, York U Lions, you get the hint. You can spot Athletic Bros. because they're always wearing some sort of team gear (or a full team unitard) and carrying their branded bag.
16. Books
Well, duuuh! Just getting you warmed up with an obvious one, making sure you're on your toes.
17. Yoga Mats
Toronto students take exceptional pride in their fitness, #fitspo.
18 Group Work
Usually 1 part pompous, condescending, control freak bro, 2 parts dedicated to getting a good grade but not a freak about it and 4 parts slacker.
19. Leafs/Jays/ Raptors Paraphernalia
We've been over this, Torontonians and specifically Toronto students show immense pride in their sports teams- win or lose.
20. Sweating
Toronto campuses are way too freakin' big and since transit is always late you can usually count on arriving to class red in the face and sweating from places you didn't know you had.
21. Fundraising
Bakesales, Vintage Record sales, hockey ticket raffles, bidding wars for first born children- Projects are hard to fund sometimes.
22. Sleeping
Learning to fall asleep anywhere is an important part of being good at university.
23.Kleenex & Cold Meds
Students are always sick, always, especially during midterms or final exams.
24.Retail Bags
Breaks between classes were made for shopping, right?
25.Apologizing
Canadians are always sorry about something.
26.Party Bros.
Brings beer to class in a Canada Dry bottle and his/their house is always the pre-drink spot before parties.
27. PDA Couple
Hand holding, walking each other to class, good luck on your midterm kisses, Barf.
28.Bags Bigger Than Their Owners
Spotted: 5 foot 2 student, weighing approximately 105 pounds, eaten by her 80 ton backpack, it's a sad story.
29.Second Hand Book Salesmen
Photocopied textbooks incorporated.
30.Hockey Sticks
Good Canadian students play hockey, even if they suck at it.