What It's Like To Fall In Love On The TTC
The only times delays are A okay.
It seems that temporary love is a common phenomenon on the TTC. Torontonians from across the GTA feel a rush of daily infatuation during routine commutes when faced with potential "the ones". Maybe if it was socially acceptable to talk to strangers on public transit, the TTC would be the new Tinder.
Please stand clear at the doors.
And BAM, there they are. Running to catch your subway, delaying everyone on the line as they do so. You prepare a resting bitch face for when they have the nerve to pass you, but when you look up, you forget what you were even supposed to be angry about in the first place.
Their eyes meet yours, and that's it; your future with them for the next 80 years has been planned.
They have a nice tattoo on their ankle, maybe you both can get matching ones on your first anniversary. They have a perfect balance of business casual attire; maybe you can be the Bay Street power couple. They have a gym bag too " aww your workout selfies at GoodLife would get a ton of likes" you know it. Is that a book in their hand? It's official, you're getting married.
As they strut down the subway line like a Hugo Boss model, you pretend that the eye contact was only for scanning purposes when you actually, thoroughly, sexed them from head to toe. They stop and casually sit on the seat directly in front of yours, which is pretty much the equivalent of them accepting your wedding proposal.
The next station is College, College Station.
'This is the one' you tell yourself. If they look up one more time, it means they totally want to smash you against the dirty Yonge-University-Spadina Line windows.
The TTC is experiencing some delays due to unexpected weather related conditions ahead. We apologize for the delay. The longer you two have together, the more in detail you can map out your future studio apartment decor. Wouldn’t it be the cutest story if one day you told your kids about how their parents met on the worst transit system in the world?
Arriving at Bloor-Yonge, Bloor-Yonge Station. Did that b*tch just sit next to them? Oh no, no, no, no, you mentally claimed them first, you don’t care if it’s crowded, you do not want to compromise the view of this beautiful human. Yeah, that's right, they better keep walking and sit beside that old lady.
So, where were we? Right, wedding vows. This is probably the only time you spend looking at another person’s reflection in the subway windows rather than your own. If that's not true love, I don’t know what is...If they get off at the same stop as you, you will know the universe wants you guys to be together for sure…
Arriving at Sheppard-Yonge, Sheppard-Yonge Station.
Why are they adjusting their stuff? No, sit back down! One more stop, stay one more stop, please. You pray they sit back down and don’t make you pull the emergency alarm. Please don’t go, don’t leave, what are you suppose to do for the next six mins to Finch? Drake did not run through the six for them to abandon this relationship like this.
Whatever, this doesn't phase you. Toronto is a breeding ground for hot individuals. Tomorrow's rush hour is a new chance to fall in love with a new stranger all over again. Maybe your soulmate actually does ride your 7am rocket.