Can We Please Talk About Betty's Strip-Tease On 'Riverdale'?
Honestly, I need a minute.
Betty Cooper is known to be all things preppy and perfect - except for when she's ~dark~ Betty of course. This week's episode of Riverdale really through me through a loop. If you haven't seen it, please stop reading now. Because y'all are about to get hit with some major spoilers.
Okay, so. This week's episodes was one of my favourites, despite one key super-weird moment. We got a bit of a break from the Black Hood - he could be Mr. Svenson aka Joe Conway, but that's still up for grabs. Instead of ruminating on Riverdale's mass killer, the kids decided to chill out and throw FP - Jughead's dad - a 'retirement' party. Because what's more exciting than retiring from a gang?
A day or so before when visiting the Whyte Worm, Betty was told about the 'serpent dance'. Apparently, if you're a girl and want to join The Serpents, the 'serpent dance' - basically a pole dance - is a form of initiation. Betty, keen on fitting into Jughead's new world, seemed to be very DTS (down-to-strip).
Archie and Veronica decided to participate in perhaps the world's saddest karaoke duet after Veronica basically straight up told Archie she doesn't love him. The two sang a rendition of Mad World - a song I would recommend NEVER singing for karaoke - before Veronica ran off the stage. Archie followed her, leaving Mad World eerily playing for everyone in the Whyte Worm.
Betty, never one to leave a mic unattended apparently, stormed the stage and eerily stripped and sang along to this SUPER SAD SONG, GUYS. It was literally the musical equivalent of stripping to Coldplay's 'Fix You' aka awkward as fuck. Jughead was really really not into it. And neither was Betty's mom. (Imagine stripping in front of your MOM??????? I'd rather die, thank-you.) Also crazy to take in Betty is a SOPHMORE IN HIGHSCHOOL in Riverdale right now. Writers, what are you doing?!?!
It seems that after this episode, Jughead and Betty are pretty much over. Betty's really not cut-out for the Serpent life (as that sad strip tease proved). And weirdly enough it seems Archie and Veronica have called it quits too. Your girlfriend not loving you is a pretty good reason to break-up, to be honest. Is it finally time for our ultimate 'end game' couple to get together??? Sorry Bughead fans, but I'm #Barchie all the way.