We all have our guilty pleasures. Some people can't live without coffee, some can't live without reality TV and some can't live without aspartame. I would know, I used to be addicted to it myself. I can thankfully say I can live without it now, but the addiction was too real.
It's well known that people are either team Pepsi or team Coke. No, they do not taste the same. Diet Coke is another world, it's the tears of angels. No matter what anyone tells you, you can't give it up. You assume your addiction is okay because other people are addicted to worse things.
I remember hearing celebrities in the 90s would just drink Diet Coke and smoke cigarettes to stay skinny. Oh, those were the days when Diet Coke was actually marketed as healthy for you. But now, you have a 'problem' if you drink it too much. Sigh. Here are the struggles only Diet Coke addicts will understand:
"Is Diet Pepsi Okay?"
You genuinely question getting up and leaving but don't want to cause a scene. No, Diet Pepsi is NOT okay, I'll just have water. I know my dad actually will say no if they only offer him Pepsi, which is a true addict right there. Soon, you come to know which spots serve which one and refuse to go to the one that sells Pepsi.
When you think you're gaining weight, you'll never blame it on Diet Coke
Even though you drink 4 a day, that can't be why. It's diet, right?!
You genuinely don't remember the last time you drank water
I drank a few sips when I brushed my teeth this morning, that totally counts!
When you don't have one you actually go through withdrawals
When it's 12 pm and you haven't had one yet and you have a migraine but refuse to believe that's why. But after one sip of Diet Coke and it goes away. So weird! Must be the caffeine!
You legitimately get mad when people try to tell you what's in Diet Coke
Listen, I've seen the videos. Do you think I would be where I am if I cared? I don't care that I can clean my toilets with it, it tastes GOOD.
When people suggest just drinking tea or coffee for caffeine
Obviously all Diet Coke addicts know there are other options for caffeine. It's all about taste, and Diet Coke tastes like heaven.
You justify your addiction with saying 'I could be addicted to worse things!'
But like, we all know you're lying to yourself. Then again, YOLO right?!
As soon as you hear the can open, you instantly get happy
The sound of the bubbles is like home to you. And don't even get me started on the first sip even if it's your fifth one today. Pure bliss! Not a struggle, but it is when you don't have one around you.
When people ask you what makes you happy, you want to reply with "Diet Coke"
Okay, that's a stretch. But all the Diet Coke addicts out there can confirm that nothing gets in the way of us and our vice.
No one will ever realize it's NEVER too early for Diet Coke
It could be 6 am and you wake up craving it. It doesn't matter, it's your kind of coffee.
When someone says they prefer fountain Diet Coke rather than in a can
You're not a true Diet Coke addict, don't even try. Us addicts will drink it whenever, wherever. It all tastes the same.
When people order wine at a fancy restaurant, you still order Diet Coke
"Hi, can I get the lobster and caviar? Oh, and I'll have a refill on my Diet Coke. Thanks!"
All your hard work never pays off at the gym because you just can't quit
Pre workout? You mean Diet Coke? Wait, people actually drink water while working out? Do you think they know there's Diet Coke in my Swell bottle right now?
You wonder how much you spend on Diet Coke a year
It usually comes down to either putting gas in your car or buying Diet Coke that's on sale. Well, guess I'll be walking everywhere!
You get mad when people try and tell you Diet Pepsi and Diet Coke taste the same
Are you kidding? Blindfold me, bitch. One is spicy and one is sweet. Fake fan.