77 Terrible But Hilarious Canadian Pick-Up Lines For Every Province And Territory
In all their cheesy glory.
Have you ever wanted to date a Canadian? Well, in order to win one over, you'll need to gain a solid understanding of their unique culture. That means learning all of the characteristic Canadian quirks, both regional and national.
What you should avoid, however, is using the following Canadian-themed pick-up lines. If you use them on a Canadian, they're almost guaranteed to backfire because they are just that ridiculous; however, they still make for a pretty hilarious read.
Here are 77 terrible but hilarious Canadian pick-up lines for every province and territory in the country, organized by region:
To read pick-up lines for BC, Alberta and Saskatchewan, click Next.
BC and the Prairies
Haida there, gorgeous.
Are you a joint? ‘Cause I’d hit that.
Vancouver isn’t the only thing getting wet tonight.
You’ve never been to Port Hardy? I’ll take you. It’s in my pants.
You’re like a BC ferry: Everyone wants to get on you.
Will you help me erect my totem pole?
I’ve got a house in Shaughnessy Heights.
Are you a shale basin? ‘Cause I’d frack you.
Bulls aren’t the only thing I know how to ride.
Those are some pretty nice Rocky Mountains you’ve got there.
Once you’ve had Alberta beef, you’ll never go back.
You must be Drumheller, ‘cause I totally dig you.
Girl, you're such a Banff (i.e., a Bad Ass, Nice, And Fascinating Female).
I can love you more than a cowboy loves a fat calf.
I want to Winnipeg your Regina.
You know what they say, wheat fields are made for sowing.
I’m going to straddle your border like Lloydminster.
I don’t play football, but I’m definitely a rough rider.
We fit together like a gitch in a wedgie.
My heart is as desolate as Saskatchewan without you.
Let me take you on a ride in my John Deere.
To read pick-up lines for Manitoba, Ontario and Quebec, click Next.
My hands are frozen. Can I put them in your pants?
Wanna make out in my Tundra Buggy?
Let's procreate like the snakes in the Narcisse Dens.
Churchill isn't the only place where you can pet a polar bear.
Will you be the Flin to my Flon?
I put the “man” in Manitoba.
You give me an Assiniboiner.
My body is “Yours to discover”.
Are you a maple tree? ‘Cause I’d tap that.
I’ll show you my CN Tower if you show me your Skydome.
Call me Kathleen Wynne ‘cause I’d spend all my money on you.
You must be Niagara Falls because you’ve got me moist.
Unlike the Leafs, I will never let you down.
I won’t quit until Huron top of me.
My feelings for you are Montreal.
On scale of one to 10, you’re a poutine.
Quebec wants to ban pit bulls… Except for the one in my pants.
You’ve got beauty like Petit Champlain and curves like Bonhomme.
You’re so stunning even the Language Police are speechless.
I love you more than my mom loves Céline Dion.
To read pick-up lines for New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, PEI and Newfoundland, click Next.
*Also speaks French*
I'll show you my Hopewell Rock if you show me your Bay of Fundy.
Woodstock? I've got a lot of wood stocked.
Girl, you are Sussex-y.
I really want to Cape Enrage your Kouchibouguac.
I'm a high tide and I'm looking to smash.
I'll get your tides flowing.
Are you a Bluenoser? 'Cause you're a dime.
You’re prettier than a summer day in Lunenburg.
Do like Theodore Tugboat and tug.
I can last the entire Cabot Trail.
I know a place that serves the best donair: My pants.
A fiddle isn’t the only thing my fingers know their way around.
My game is just like Alexander Keith's: "Those who like it, like it a lot."
Prince Edward Island
Please harvest my Cavendish potatoes.
Anne of Green Gables? More like Anne of Green Babeles.
I can name something that's longer than Confederation Bridge.
The thought of you makes me redder than the sands at North Shore.
Take an Avonleap of faith and go on a date with me!
You look like a vision in your dress tartan.
Wanna churn butter with me?
You're a beluga in this sea of cod.
I want you for myself like Newfoundland has its own time zone.
Can I slide my iceberg into your alley?
Newfoundland isn't the only thing that's rock hard.
Have you ever been fishing? 'Cause we should hook up sometime.
Do you like whales? 'Cause we can go hump back at my place.
I'm gonna make you say "Yes b'y" all night.
To read pick-up lines for the Territories, click Next.
Can I explore your Northwest Passage?
You know what they say about guys with big snowshoes.
I’m not wearing any long johns.
Yukon check out my Klondike any time.
You couldn't cut the sexual tension in here with a Yellowknife.
I won't take no for an answer. I'm having Nunavut.
Wanna go back to my igloo and cuddle?
Is that a mini Inuksuk in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Can I hiber-mate with you?
You look sexy even in layers.
Girl, you're thicker than Baffin Island.
I really caribou-t you.