https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_1sf5hhR60
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
1: “Brain” (1989)
There's nothing like watching a wholesome episode of Popular Mechanics for Kids, only to hit commercials, witness this freaky shit, and never sleep again. Although, I’ll give credit where credit is due and admit this was far more effective than its American counterpart:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub_a2t0ZfTs
Video cred – Partnership for a Drug-Free America
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FV6PM8KjBZg
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
2. "Hip Choice" (1993)
“THANKS BRO, BUT I’M JUST GONNA GO AHEAD AND CALL MY OTHER GUY.” This should’ve been a PSA on how not to sell drugs. Give a round of applause for Edward Needlehands – your friendly neighbourhood AIDS dealer – as he attempts to corrupt a pair of developmentally delayed cabbage patch kids. And right when you thought things couldn’t get any worse, production decided to just go ahead and give him NO EYES, because, NO EYES!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOBzQpBJUh8
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
3. "Loser" (1995)
Oh shoot, I had it wrong all along! I thought the dipshit with the girlfriend was supposed to be the loser and these badasses with rock star hair, chilling in a 1969 FORD MUSTANG - NO BIG DEAL - were the cool kids. Interpreting is hard when you’re six-and-a-half!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4DA6hrDZ8s
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
4. "Crack Bag" (1990)
"...and now back to your morning cartoon!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZKqtD2lJ84
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
5. “What do you do when you find a needle?” (1991)
“Leave it alone!” “Tell your mom!” “Tell a teacher!”. This momproganda probably interested you in needles even more, leading you to watch crazy street-drug documentaries on Youtube.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TA_otNq-akg
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
6. "How was your day?" (1994)
While we’re still on the subject of momproganda, we might as well get the Holy Grail out of the way. I’m confident this clip wasn’t even intended to be a PSA, but was actually a deleted scene from “7th Heaven” that somehow found its way into the wrong briefcase.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=92Qefq-UiG4
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
7. “Syringe” (1990)
Ah yes, another quality anti-heroin PSA airing over a network who’s audience still traded Pokémon cards. HEROIN – THE GATEWAY DRUG – COMING TO AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL NEAR YOU! You don’t just get to do heroin; it requires years of self-destruction and at least one tour with a metal band. How about something a little more on point:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AuLkMBAFZg
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
8. “Don’t you put it in your mouth” – 1992
Finally! A PSA that actually coincides with the maturity level of its audience. That’s right kids, No CRACK BAGS here! Just good, old fashioned, unintentionally sexual, horrifying fun!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuiPl4P1wyg
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
9. “The trap” – 1993
At the very least, we can give CCA a pat on the back for resisting the urge to jam a rusty needle into that block of cheese. You know, to make their message EXTRA CLEAR. Very out of character for them, but I’ll take it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNHUXCNnWM0
Video cred – Saskatchewan Safety Council
10. "Simon is about to kill his father" (early '90s)
The old lady in this one kills me almost as hard as Simon kills his father. "Excuse me, aren't you putting on the boy's seatbelt?" Directed by the highly astute Saskatchewan Safety Council, this is possibly the best, worst PSA of all time. The haunting nursery music, the prehistoric film editing, and the way Simon’s dad blatantly disregards that old lady, moments before his doom – this one has it all!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3RH2C6TiSI
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
11. “Boutique” (1998)
What the hell just happened? Imagine seven-year-old you being subjected to this insanity in between episodes of "Uh Oh!" It does explain these hazy flashbacks I keep having of chasing my sister around the house with lipstick smeared all over my face yelling, “WHY BE YOU WHEN YOU CAN BE ME?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgvv4wnVlFU
Video cred – The Stay Alert Stay Safe Organization
12. "Stay Alert! Stay Safe!" – 1994
Remember kids! Everywhere is dangerous, everyone is a pedophile, and most importantly, "if anybody ever tries to grab you, fall to the ground and roll, or just keep spinning! You'll be much harder to hold that way!" Thanks for the advice Gert and Bert!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mrhuaj540Aw
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
13. "Drug Rap" (1990)
Not sure whether or not the pharmaceutical companies had a hand in this one, but my god, is it unnerving. Irritatingly catchy, too. And look at that man's mustache. Maybe I'm just paranoid from "Stay Alert! Stay Safe!" but the last time I saw a mustached man smiling like that, he was being lowered into the back of a squad car.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZS8_oN60so
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
14. "Rehab" (1992)
The emotion was so intense, I was always waiting for them to lock lips at the end but it never happened. At least it has that great uplifting quote, “if you try and stop a friend from doing drugs, you may not succeed. But, hey, at least you tried.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmplMQ6CbmA
Video cred - Concerned Children's Advertisers
15. "Mimic" (1990)
My god that was terrifying. The little girl waving at the end is what nightmares are made of. Nevertheless, this is still, somehow, miles ahead of its American counterpart:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUXb7do9C-w
Video cred – Partnership for a Drug-Free America
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBfi8OEz0rA
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
16. "House Hippo" (1998)
For all the kids who completely missed the point of this commercial and asked for a House Hippo for Christmas, we salute you!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?list=PL08E84C8337E04D53&v=NgUGvZkQd0M
Video cred – Concerned Children's Advertisers
17. "Smart as You" – 1997
I'll round out my list with this fine number. If their intent was to get you to turn off your TV, they were probably successful, because this was the most annoying, most overplayed Canadian PSA of all time.