We all look forward to our GNOs because realistically, they are the only thing that gets us through the week. The hype about where we're going to go, what we're going to wear, and who we're going to see is an on-going and motivating topic in the squad group chat.
They are always nights full of amazing memories that we'll never remember. However, gathering up a squad after a night out is like trying to heard an army of infants that just don't want to cooperate. Once the group is finally accounted for, there is a very specific and imperative sequence of events that every squad has to go through.
1. Before even leaving the bar, the entire squad must rally and search near and far for the bff's lost phone.
2. Try to convince one of the girls not to go home with the creepy guy she was dancing with at EFS.
3. Take all heels off because we're free spirits who can walk barefoot down King St. and still judge other squads for doing it at the same time.
4. FOOD. This is the most important part of the night. Finding drunk munchies is a squad must and the debate between pizza, Burrito Boyz, or Smoke's can get pretty heated.
5. After the starvation has been satisfied, it is time to find the squad's way home. This usually consists of trying to figure out how we can get a free Uber ride. There is no shame in asking strangers to download the app for the first time.
6. Have the very best time of our lives jamming out to throwbacks in the Uber. If we're lucky, the Uber will have a colourful strobe light of some sort.
7. Make an obnoxiously long snapchat story we will all regret in the morning.
8. Make the necessary pit stop for the light weight in the group to puke while the rest of us argue the $75 dollar puking fee does not apply.
9. Actively swipe right because we're bold bitches that aren't afraid to be the first to message 10s.
10. One by one, the squad falls asleep on whatever couch or air mattress we can find. This doesn't last for long because dehydration is a real struggle and each girl needs to get their own personal jug of water.
11. Waking up with a full face of smudge is a reoccurring and terrifying look that every girl experiences the next morning. Taking off make-up was just not a priority the night before.
12. One of the best parts of a squad night out is the sharing circle the morning after. We use this to laugh about the events the night before and make each other feel better about the mistakes we never want to make again (but probably will).
13. Each squad member looks over the messages they wish they never sent.
14. We all feel the anxiety when the notification that someone has tagged you in photos appears.
15. The mutual agreement that the squad diet starts tomorrow because the bodies need hangover food in order to recuperate is established in the group chat.
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