We all like to pretend that sex stays in the bedroom, but the truth is I think there might be a little part in everybody that delights in the salacious thrill of getting caught in the act.
Whether you're sneaking away to a bathroom for a randy romp at your friend's party or just getting frisky in the back of a dimly lit theatre, exhibitionist and voyeurism kinks exist all around us.
Sex, marriage and family therapist Jenifer Smith says the thrill of public sex is all in the possibility of getting caught and the novelty of the act.
"People like to have sex in different places because it changes the energy," she explained. "It changes the experience. A lot of people like the thrill of voyeurism. Having people watch them have sex or even the thrill of almost being caught or being caught having sex."
So if you've ever had sex in the 6ix outside of the bedroom, there's no need to feel ashamed because you're one of many couples that have.
If you don't believe me, here are 11 Toronto locals on the wildest places they've hooked up in and city, and they might just surprise you.
A hospital changing room
A stack of dirty scrubs.
"In the hospital changing rooms for doctors."
On Queen West
CP24 car sign on Queen West in Toronto.
"Under the spinning CP24 truck at John and Queen Street."
Public sauna
Inside of a sauna.
"In the apartment sauna of my old building that I didn't live in anymore."
A pharmacy
Inside a pharmacy.
"The pharmacists treatment bed late on a week day night at a 24/7 clinic with the pharmacist!"
At a work party
A group of people at a party.
"CityTV building window overlooking John street during their old film fest parties."
Why is public sex popular?
Smith says that public sex is a pretty common fantasy, so if you're dreaming of doing it in the great outdoors, you're not alone.
In fact, some people even get off knowing that someone is watching.
I've personally never treated sex like a spectator sport, but if everyone's consenting, I say game on.
(As long as you, your partner and the people around you are all informed beforehand.)
Voyeurism is when you get pleasure from seeing other people having sex, and exhibitionists get off having people watch them have sex.
"People really enjoy other people watching them have sex. It's the thrill or even the performance aspect," says Smith.
She says some people enjoy putting on a show and making sure that anyone watching can see them pleasuring their partner and doing a good job.
For all my people who need external validation... even in their sex lives – I see you.
Pop culture has popularized this fantasy by glamorizing public sex in movies and TV with scenes that are nearly impossible to recreate without getting arrested.
Take the 2014 movie Gone Girl where the couple has anniversary sex in the stacks of a small independent bookstore. Is it sexy? Yes. Is it possible to get away with a hookup in a small store– probably not?
(Remember, sex in public is not legal, my friends.)
But as time has shown again and again, a little law won't stop these randy Torontonians.
Remember in summer 2022 when a couple had sex in the 500's section of the Rogers Centre at a Blue Jays game?
The couple was caught in the act and recorded by other attendees, which is the downfall of public sex – you may not be as sneaky as you think.
"I think people really get caught up in that fantasy of what looked really sexy and appealing in that movie or that show. But then, when you try to recreate it, it doesn't always look like that," Smith explains.
How can you plan public sex?
A couple kissing in public.
If your heart is set on having public sex, there are a few tips and tricks you may want to take before endeavouring outdoors.
First off, you need to talk to your partner about just how far you're willing to let this tryst go and what your limitations are on people possibly seeing you.
"There's a big difference of having sex somewhere where you have the potential to get caught, or being arrested for lewd acts, in public," says Smith. "So you need to have those conversations of 'What's our limitations? How far are we willing to go?'"
After you have a conversation, the next step is to decide whether you want to plan your adventure or be spontaneous and strike when the iron is hard hot.
Smith says that while spontaneous public sex can be great, planning does come in handy when it comes to the logistics of finding a private enough area to take your private parts out.
For example, a park mid-day with children running around is not an ideal setting, but she says planning ahead to visit after dark might be a bit more doable.
But at the end of the day, you and your partner both need to be comfortable with the risk.
What happens if you get caught having sex in public?
Sex in public can get you in a sticky legal situation.
According to section 173 of the Criminal Code, indecent acts are illegal, and anyone "who wilfully does an indecent act in a public place in the presence of one or more persons, or in any place with intent to insult or offend any person" can get charged.
If you get a summary charge, you could get up to six months in jail, and if it's an indictable offence, you could face up to two years in prison.
So public sex doesn't come without consequences, but if you want to get your rocks off in public without catching a case, you might want to try a .
This interview has been condensed and edited for clarity.
This article's cover image was used for illustrative purposes only.
