5 Tips From A Sex Expert To Get Back Into The Swing Of Dating If You're Out Of Practice

Make sure you're experimenting with solo sex!

Senior Staff Writer
A couple holding hands.

A couple holding hands.

If you've put your dating life on pause during the last few years and are ready to dive back in, it might feel a little overwhelming to know where to begin.

Whether you're looking for love or seeking something a little more casual, figuring out how to approach dating in the time of COVID-19 is definitely different than it was prior to the pandemic.

Narcity spoke to Dr. Jess O'Reilly, a sex and relationship expert at Lovehoney, about some tips on how to get back into the proverbial saddle.

Enlist the help of a friend

Three women looking at a phone in a cafe.

Three women looking at a phone in a cafe.

Ammentorp | Dreamstime

If you're getting back onto the apps, ask one of your buddies to help you refresh and update your bio.

"Get a friend to write your bio in point form because they’re likely better at identifying and highlighting your best features," advises Dr. Jess.

Now is not the time to be humble — let people know how great you are!

Experiment with solo sex

A rumpled bed.

A rumpled bed.

Natthapon Ngamnithiporn | Dreamstime

Dr. Jess says that if you've stayed away from having sex with a partner, you should try experimenting with masturbation and trying out new things.

"Change positions, try a new technique or toy, explore new fantasies and generally explore novelty so that you're open to new approaches once you partner up," she says.

Let people know you're looking

A group of people having dinner on a patio and having a toast.

A group of people having dinner on a patio and having a toast.

Monkey Business Images | Dreamstime

Make sure people are aware that you're back in the dating world.

"There is so much undue shame around being single and dating, but there need not be — it's so supposed to be fun," she says.

"And your network (friends, colleagues, family, neighbours) may be able to introduce you to potential dates, so don't be shy about telling them you're in the market."

Who knows — maybe that person down the road you wave to every morning knows someone who's absolutely perfect for you!

Go on low-pressure dates

\u200bTwo people walking on a trail in a park.

Two people walking on a trail in a park.

Katarzyna Bialasiewicz | Dreamstime

"Sitting face-to-face for several hours over a meal or committing to an evening with someone new can feel overwhelming after several years of restricted and limited socialization," Dr. Jess shares.

She suggests you go with something a little more low-key as you ease yourself back into dating, like a short walk or a midday coffee when you have to go back to work.

While that may seem like a short date to some, you can always extend it if you're feeling it or let the anticipation build until you're able to see them again.

Be honest

Two people out on a breakfast date.

Two people out on a breakfast date.

Oksana Krasiuk | Dreamstime

Dr. Jess says you should let people know what you're looking for from the onset.

"If you want something casual, don't pretend you're in the market for a committed relationship — and vice versa," she says.

"The pandemic helped many people to really identify their values and hopefully this translates into more honesty in dating and relating."

Good luck out there, everyone!

Sarah Rohoman
Senior Staff Writer
Sarah Rohoman is a Senior Staff Writer for Narcity Canada’s Trending Desk focused on Canadian celebrities and is based in Toronto, Ontario.