What The Pandemic’s After Party Is Actually Gonna Look Like In Canada

Brit: Hello, and welcome back. Happy Friday. This is Now On Narcity and I'm Brit.

Cormac: And I am Cormac.

Lea: I'm Lea.

Tyeler: And I'm Tyeler, and welcome back to the digital dive bar.

Lea: This week we're discussing what Canadians say they want to do after the pandemic and where they want to travel. Plus, we learned just how much François Legault thinks an apartment costs in Montreal.

Cormac: Is it a lot of money, Lea?

Lea: No. It is not.

Cormac: No.

Brit: All right, we are queuing up for our weekly segment called Shot and Chaser, where we bring you some headlines that are tearing through our site this week, you won't believe some of these are actually real. And of course, followed by a little joke by your hosts here. Let's do it.

Tyeler: Your hosties with the mosties... I hate myself for saying that. Okay…

Brit: I didn't love that. A B.C. man allegedly impersonating a cop was pulling people over, and he also may have been drunk. People really are going to great lengths to socialize these days.

Cormac: For many, for many reasons, please don't try that at home. Many, many reasons. The Proud Boys just announced that they are officially done in Canada and they said that they were quote, "never a white supremacist group", which is truly bringing new meaning to the phrase "little white lie".

Tyeler: Gosh.

Lea: Two separate cases of Swine Flu variants have been found in Manitoba. The same energy as an I've missed you text from your sh*tty ex.

Cormac: You're so many years too late, Swine Flu. You've had your time.

Brit: It's over.

Tyeler: Get packing.

Cormac: Move on.

Tyeler: Canadians can enter a contest to get a 3D replica of Joe Jonas's hand through Expedia. But please, for the love of God, don't tell us what you want to do with it. I'm begging you.

Cormac: Justin Trudeau says travel could restart the summer quote "if everything goes well". Narrator: It did not go well.

Tyeler: Who says "narrator" like that?

Cormac: Tye couldn't even wait till I finished that one. That's how funny it was.

Lea: Tiger King's Carole Baskin just launched a cryptocurrency and it's called $CAT. Perfect for all the cool cats and kittens who want to dive into the crypto market.

Tyeler: Oh my gosh.

Cormac: Of which there are thousands I'm sure.

Tyeler: She actually tweeted the funniest thing I'm going to read it to you, so she tweeted "I'm purring like a bobcat rolling in catnip because we just launched $CAT." Like that's a real, that's real. That's a real thing.

Tyeler: Can you just imagine?

Brit: Facebook, Facebook mom energy to be honest.

Lea: She's definitely that person that went outside of curfew and brought her man on a leash in Montreal.

Cormac: I remember that! Bringing up so many just like so many suppressed first wave memories that I've been trying so hard to get away from.

Brit: Alberta's COVID rates are the highest in North America. And premier Jason Kenney wants people to quote "smarten up." No one knows who the pot or the kettle is in this scenario.

Tyeler: A rogue rocket is expected to crash into Earth and it could land where people live. Oh Lord, take me now.

Lea: Please take me now.

Cormac: Hold on.

Brit: Jesus take the wheel.

Cormac: Where people could live is maybe the most vague sentence ever.

Tyeler: Right?

Cormac: I need this narrowed down at least a little bit.

Tyeler: First of all, I'm terrified of space and this is just one of the reasons why. So, basically a massive rocket launched from China and it's heading back towards Earth — but nobody knows exactly where or when it's expected to land. And yeah, they're saying it could land where people live. So they're saying the recent update is it might land on Saturday, May 8th, so tomorrow. But if you're looking for updates, there's lots on Twitter. There is a lot on Twitter. I'm sure most of it is speculation, but I mean, follow the story because you might see something fall from the sky pretty soon here.

Brit: So it's gonna fall from space, crash down to earth, fingers crossed it lands in the ocean, like you would anticipate. But yeah, they do say it could land in a populated area. And some people are saying Houston.

Cormac: Who wants to make the "Houston, we have a problem" joke?

Cormac: There's obviously so much COVID news out in the world right now, a lot of people talking about new restrictions, borders, et cetera, et cetera. But it turns out for a lot of our readers, the stories that are doing really well are stories about the post-pandemic, which isn't surprising. We're all thinking about what's going to happen when this is over. We're sort of half in the homestretch with the vaccines right now. And one of those particular stories that did super, super well this week Tye was a story about the top three things that Canadians are most excited about post-pandemic, right?

Tyeler: Yeah! So there's a new survey done by Scotiabank, and they chatted with Canadians about the top three things that they wanted to do most post-pandemic. And so this is what the results were: 30% of people said attending large gatherings with family and friends. Understandable, relatable. 16% said travelling by air outside of Canada, and 14% said dining at restaurants with friends.

Cormac: Nice.

Brit: Right.

Tyeler: That all comes to mind for me for sure. Cormac, what are you looking forward to post-pandemic?

Cormac: Oh man, I mean, I think the restaurant thing is great. Um, there's so many Toronto restaurants that I've sort of discovered by working at Narcity that I'm just like, so desperate to get to. But honestly, it's sports. I just am dying to go see a sports game, all the annoying little things that I miss, or that I didn't miss when I actually was going to sports games, like the massive crowds leading you out of the arena that you're just like are terrified by and the sweat and the concrete smell. It's like, please bottle it up. Give it to me now. I would give an arm and a leg to go and sit in a gross stadium and pay too much money right now. I would love that more than anything. What about you Lea?

Lea: Um, I think I'm, you know, Montreal's restaurant scene is unmatched. So I'm just looking forward to sitting in a restaurant. Even though half of my favourite restaurants have closed. Whatever is left, I'm there.

Cormac: That was a heck of a claim to just drop on a podcast, by the way, about the Montreal food scene.

Lea; Well, I mean, it's facts. What about you, Brit?

Brit: I mean, I'm desperately missing the bar scene. I really, really feel like being on a sweaty dance floor right now and dancing with friends and drinking sh*tty high balls is emblematic of everything that we've been missing. Just like bodies, way too many bodies in a hot sweaty space. It's just representative of exactly where I'm going to be the second I can. I'm feeling like if I was a single woman I'd be saying I was gonna just come out hot the gates and smooch a stranger cause that represents pre-COVID.

Tyeler: Brit would have a hot girl summer.

Cormac: Oh, yeah.

Brit: Honestly, Tye, I know that you said you relate with the three things. But is there one you relate to most or something you're really dying to do?

Tyeler: I mean, I'm dying to see my family. I have a really big family and we're all very, very close, like matching outfits close. So I'm really excited to see them again. But I think for me, from a cultural perspective, oh man, I would give so much to go to a concert. And just be like bumping elbows with people and having beers split on me. Like, I would be so happy and relishing in that moment right now. And so I feel like they're just gonna be even better than before.

Cormac: I mean, we're saying this, but we all know right deep in our hearts that as soon as we get back onto a dance floor and someone spills a beer on us, it's straight back to being annoyed.

Tyeler: Oh pissed, yeah pissed.

Cormac: No one is, we're not going to forget we're not going to forgive for that.

Lea: Straight back. I'm quarantining.

Tyeler: Especially if I'm hit with a vodka cran it's game over.

Brit: Truly.

Cormac: It's yeah, shut it down.

Brit: You know what, you know, when you arrive at a bar? And you're not quite drunk enough to be there yet? And people are scream talking right in your ears and you're like "oh, I'm gonna need 10 more drinks before I can do this".

Tyeler: Oh, just take that back. Yeah, no, or like spit talking? Oh, man. Oh, man.

Cormac: I don't care how long it's been since I've been on an airplane, I'm going to complain about it. I'm sorry, that's just the way it's gonna happen. I am a little surprised to see travel only second, to be honest, I think I would have imagined a lot more people would want to travel and we've seen that a little bit too in our articles that we've written. There was a Narcity one I know talking about millions of people who are dying to travel.

Lea; Yeah, there was a survey by Finders Travel Index that showed that there were millions of Canadians that could be planning a trip or vacation before the summer is over, which is in a couple of months. So the survey found that an estimated 5 million people were planning already for their travel plans.

Cormac: Wow. I've no doubt that people want to travel again but we see hesitancy for sure and we also on the same hand see companies that are going out of their way to discuss and dismiss travel hesitancy. One of my favourite examples of this is, this popped up on my radar a couple of weeks ago and it is so so interesting, but there is a resort in Greece on the Island of Rhodes, but there's a Greek resort there at the Mitsis Grand Hotel, and what they've done is they have shipped in or flown in 187 Dutch tourists, and they have locked them down on this resort and it's sort of like a travel test. And they're like kind of vlogging and they're showing videos about it and it shows people without a mask in the pool and stuff. And it's sort of like this tester and like, kind of holding it up and saying like "oh no no, like these Dutch tourists".

Tyeler: It's kind of like reality TV. I want to know what's going on there.

Brit: I'm shocked that's not a Netflix series.

Cormac: I know, hey?

Lea: Big Brother Rhodes.

Cormac: Yeah, it's so strange. But again, it goes to show like, if they're, they're trying to prove that like, "No, no, no, travel is great." But it's eerie, a little bit, to see these videos of the people on the record talking about how great of a time they're having. It's really a bit bizarre.

Tyeler: That's so interesting.

Brit: It feels like The Truman Show?

Cormac: Yeah.

Brit: Like, just in a bubble. But I'm not saying that if that opportunity was presented to me, I'd be turning it down.

Cormac: I mean, yeah, if it was Rhodes.

Tyeler: I'm there. How long are they - Cormac, how long are they at the resort for? Like, is there a certain number of days, they have to stay there?

Cormac: They were there for 8 days.

Tyeler: I feel like after 8 days, they would kind of have created a kind of like a community, no? Like, everyone would kind of be chummed up?

Brit: Tyeler's like "They're all falling in love".

Tyeler: That's the first thing that I think of! They're probably are some fairytale love stories happening.

Cormac: Well, I will say that there are restrictions there. You have to wear your mask at all times unless you're in the pool or eating or physically distanced.

Tyeler: Or smooching.

Cormac: You have to keep physically distanced. Cut it out. Cut it out. No, no, none of that.

Brit: No smooching.

Cormac: It was done in the name of safely restarting international travel, that seems obvious — for obvious reasons that's top of mind for a lot of travel companies. But it's not the weirdest thing that we've seen a travel company do to try and spur international travel is it, Brit?

Brit: Not even close. In fact, something very strange has happened.

Lea: Something very peculiar has happened.

Tyeler: I'm burning up right now.

Brit: And we're, we're all sort of reeling from the shock of this headline.

Lea: We're still recovering.

Brit: Expedia is giving away 150 3D printed replicas of Joe Jonas's hand. I'll let that digest for a moment.

Tyeler: So, I'm sorry, wait.

Lea: Process that for a second.

Tyeler: First of all —

Brit: It's a literal model of his hand. It's very, very strange. It's very, very eerie. Everything about it is strange and eerie. And even if you see the photographs of Joe Jonas posing for the campaign it's absolutely terrifying and really weird.

Tyeler: So I just want to, like, imagine, okay, imagine being in the room at Expedia and they're like, "Okay guys, let's think about this. How do we incentivize people to travel?" and someone's like, "I've got it. We need to make a replica of Joe Jonas' hand."

Brit: Someone's like, "Do you remember the Jonas Brothers?"

Cormac: "We need to find one celebrity whose entire vibe is just safe international travel."

Tyeler: "It's got to be Joe Jonas."

Cormac: "It's got to be Joe."

Brit: Yeah. unanimous, and the whole shtick is that it's a helping hand initiative.

Tyeler: Oh god.

Brit: Everything from start to finish, like I said, it kind of like it has a Sims energy. He looks like an absolute Cyborg and all of the photos and he —

Lea: Big Sims energy.

Brit: — and the hand itself is very strange. I can't say that I signed up to get one.

Tyeler: What do you do with it also? Like is it a collectible item?

Lea: It is a limited edition piece of art. It's like very exclusive art.

Brit: It's signed.

Lea: It's signed.

Cormac: Signed. Ah.

Tyeler: So imagine you just had a glass box in your house and people come over, they're like, "What? What is that?" You're like, "That's actually Joe Jonas's hand."

Brit: Yeah, you're like, "Do you remember 2021?" It was weird.

Cormac: My question to you guys is which celebrity's hand would incentivize you to travel internationally. You could get one signed hand and it would make you travel again, which hand would it be?

Lea: Madonna.

Cormac: Yeah. Okay.

Brit: That would be iconic.

Lea: I'm saying it.

Cormac: Tye, what about you?

Tyeler: Oh hands down, Vince Vaughn. No pun intended.

Cormac: Why Vince Vaughn? And why is this not the first time you've brought up Vince Vaughn?

Tyeler: Okay, guys, Vince Vaughn is my number one celebrity crush and I know, I know this is - I just think he's the total package brains, beauty, humour.

Cormac: The facial expression Brit just made. Do you think the tactic was to make something so bizarre that people talk about it?

Tyeler: I mean, potentially. But here's the thing.

Lea: I don't think so.

Tyeler: If you were like, "Guys, there's this resort in Greece, Vince Vaughn's gonna be there and you got to stay there for two weeks." I'd be like, "Okay great where do I sign up?"

Cormac: Okay, enough with the Vince.

Tyeler: But a hand that sits and is not usable? I just don't get it.

Cormac: It's not even — it's not even Vince's hand.

Tyeler: And it's not even Vince. Oh, Vinnie. God love him.

Tyeler: So on last week's podcast, we talked about affordability for housing in Canada. And unfortunately, it doesn't sound like Premier François Legault listens to our podcast because Lea, why don't you break down what's going on in Quebec right now?

Lea: Well, he definitely does not listen to our podcast. That's a fact. So this week in weird Quebec news, Québec Solidaire leader Manon Massé asked Premier François Legault what he thought the average rent for a Montreal apartment could cost. This was his answer.

[Clip] François Legault: (English Translation): Well, listen, it depends on the size of the apartment, but I would say... it could maybe start at $500, $600 per month, [and] quickly can rise to $1,000 per month.

Lea: So if you don't speak French, shoutout à tous mes francophones. But if you don't speak French, basically what Legault said is that an apartment in Montreal could cost between $500 and $600 a month and could go up to a thousand dollars, quote "pretty quickly".

Brit: That feels like all of our lived experiences, right?

Cormac: Well, Montreal is cheap. Let's be real. It's known for being cheap, but I'm assuming Lea, it's probably not that cheap.

Lea: No, so no. Cheap but not that cheap. That's how you guys — that's how every person who has never been to Montreal. That's how someone would describe it to them cheap, but not that cheap. In every way.

Cormac: So he must have gotten some he must have got some flak for that then.

Lea: Yes. So, Legault was met with a lot of criticism because of what he said, Quebecers and politicians — namely Manon Massé said — he was out of touch with the reality of everyday people, particularly low-income people and families. So naturally, as the internet does, meme makers from Montreal had a field day with this comment.

Cormac: Yeah I saw a phenomenal article from Teddy Elliot from MTL Blog, one of your co-workers Lea, where I think he showed exactly what that kind of house would look like, right what that apartment would look like for that amount of money.

Lea: Yes, shout out to Teddy for that amazing idea. So I mean, they were nothing short of dungeons. I'm sure you can imagine what they look like. But Legault actually, in a news conference following the day that he was asked the question, he said he was proud to come from a very middle-class family and he remained very close to the people over the years that he has been in politics. And he actually said he wasn't talking about an apartment but he was referring to what students have to pay to share an apartment.

Tyeler: Interesting.

Lea: In Montreal.

Tyeler: You know what I would love I would love to see a comparison between the photos of the Montreal apartments and then for the same price point, what you could find in like Toronto or Vancouver.

Cormac: Well, I've got some news for you then Tye - because in talking about this, and in researching this, I spoke to my coworker, Abby, who works at Narcity city as well. She said that her and her Editor Lily looked into this. They wanted to find examples of $500 apartments in Toronto. They literally couldn't find a single one.

Tyeler: Yeah, I was gonna say you could find maybe a bike locker.

Brit: Probably not.

Cormac: Yeah, probably not.

Brit: What Leah said about Legault referring to himself as middle class, very middle class, leads me to wonder what the heck is this middle class that he's talking about? Never heard of it. Never, never seen.

Lea: Can't relate.

Brit: And we actually wrote an article on Narcity, this was by Patrick on the Toronto desk. And it turns out, you actually have to make about $135,000 a year to be considered middle class in Toronto. So six figures for a modest middle-class boy, wow.

Lea: Well, the whole thing the whole issue in Quebec right now that's going on and that's a very hot topic right now is that a lot of political parties as well as mayor Valerie Plante continue to say that there is a serious housing crisis in Montreal, and they continue to the city especially and some places in the province are starting to build a lot of affordable housing units. They just built 1500 recently, but Legault has been asked flat out, "is there a housing crisis in Montreal?" And he denies that it's a thing and it's happening. But we continue to see it happening in Montreal, especially, I have written — and some of my colleagues in Montreal have written — about local businesses having to shut down because of unreasonable rent increases. July 1 is right around the corner, which is moving day in Montreal.

Cormac: Interesting.

Lea: And yeah, we're talking like 40-50% increases to rent.

Tyeler: Wait, Lea. So I've heard this term before: "Moving day." Can you break that down to us? Because I don't actually know what this is. And I feel like a lot of people on the East Coast also don't know what this is. So can you break down moving day for us?

Lea: It's just a designated day. I mean, you don't have to, it's not like you're not allowed to move on another day. Like —

Cormac: It's not like a musical chair sort of thing.

Brit: But it is a little bit! Like, when I lived in Montreal, I was equally shook. I lived there for two years. I moved once. And everyone was like — every single lease I came across, started and concluded on July 1.

Cormac: What are the chances François is moving out of his place in July this year?

Lea: He is selling his — he is selling his $4.9 million dollar mansion.

Tyeler: Oh, middle class. Yes.

Brit: That does not sound like $500!

Tyeler: That screams middle class to me.

Lea: That is very middle class. But to be fair, I want to say this for fairness and balance. I'm a journalist. I have to —

Cormac: Ugh if you insist, okay.

Lea: He became a multimillionaire after he founded Air Transat.

Cormac: Okay.

Lea: So that is why he is rich.

Brit: He got new money!

Tyeler: What an amazing episode that was. Now, we would love to transition into the final segment of our show this week, which we have renamed. I don't know that it had a name before. Nope, but we have named it *Ding Ding Ding.*

Brit, Lea, Tyeler: Last call!

Tyeler: The last call segment is going to be a breakdown of what your co-hosts are looking forward to in the news in the coming week leading up to your next episode. I personally am very much looking forward to finally having a vaccination appointment in my calendar in Ontario. I'm eager to see how the rest of the vaccination rolls out in this province. It's been a long road and I know that it's starting to slowly but surely be available to more and more communities here in Ontario. So I'm excited to see how the rollout happens. Brit, what's on your mind this week?

Brit: Okay, so something that's getting me is throughout the pandemic, we've developed a whole new vocabulary, a whole new array of buzzwords, if you will, things like social distancing, things like the word quarantine whole new meaning and another one of those buzzwords that's come into play is the vaccination passport, or like vaccine passport. And it's been talked about a lot in other countries and on other continents. But lately, Trudeau has sort of been sort of sprinkling it into convo. And on Tuesday, he chatted about virtually a vaccine passport, which he is calling a very sexy proof of vaccination or vaccine certification.

Tyeler: Spicy.

Brit: The sex appeal is out of control. But he said that he has been working with allies, and I quote, "particularly in Europe," and looking carefully at the idea of implementing sort of a travel alliance. Are we talking Atlantic Bubble, but a little more intercontinental? I'm dying to know. Lea, how are you feeling this week? What are you looking forward to?

Lea: I don't know if you guys are TV bingers like me, I think a lot of us had to become TV bingers during COVID and during quarantine. But TV has been on fire during the pandemic. I don't know if it's just because we're so isolated. But for me, it's just been better than ever. Handmaid's Tale season four just started. I'm obsessed already.

Cormac: Nice.

Lea: And I'm super excited for everything Real Housewives. The Real Housewives, you guys this is serious. The Real Housewives Vacation, mixing all the different housewives franchises, is just wrapping up their filming and I'm so excited to see everybody like from different shows all together. It's, like, mind-blowing.

Brit: What?

Lea: Cross over.

Tyeler: That's what the kids are calling these days, cheugy.

Lea: They were I think in Turks and Caicos, I'm so excited for that. And I'm so excited for The Real Housewives reunion in May of New Jersey. Um, I love Real Housewives of New Jersey literally obsessed, and it's going to be wild. I just want to meet Dolores. If you guys know who I'm talking about, I love Dolores and Theresa. Okay, bye.

Brit: Cormac.

Tyeler: Cormy.

Cormac: I'm just all I'm doing now is waiting for movie theatres to be open again. We've got some really cool movies that are coming out, especially a few that have some sort of local angles to them. Two Ontarians are set to star in Marvel movies coming out in the near future. We have Simu Liu, and Markham's very own Iman Vellani, who's going to be in a television series this year for Marvel and then a film next year. I am just so, so desperate to find out when I can get back into the movie theatre.

Brit: Are you a movie theatre boy?

Cormac: I mean

Lea: Are movie theatres closed in Ontario?

Cormac: Movie theatres are closed.

Tyeler: Yes. Very much so. Very much so closed. Cormac, have you ordered Cineplex on Uber Eats at all?

Cormac: No, I haven't.

Lea: I did once.

Tyeler: You've gotta have a movie night and you've got to order Cineplex popcorn, Twizzlers, Coke.

Cormac: I'm saving, I'm saving myself for when I get back in. I don't want to because I'm just gonna make me miss it more. I'm just with as soon as I can get back in, pay too much for some chocolate and sit down in a movie theatre with a bunch of other people who don't respect the movie theatre experience, I'll know I'm home. I'll know I'm back.

Cormac: Whether you're listening to this surreptitiously in a movie theatre, or you're listening to this as you wait for your new vaccine passport to get stamped. Thank you so much for spending your time with us. I'm Cormac.

Brit: I'm Brit.

Lea: I'm Lea.

Tyeler: And I'm Tyeler. And we'll see you at the digital dive bar next week.