7 things are totally normal in Ontario but will confuse literally everyone else in Canada

Ever been to The Beer Store? Or paid Hydro? What about drinking milk from a bag?

Brunette girl on the road. Right: Sunset photo of Ontario city

Do I look like I drink bagged milk?

Lauren DiBenedetto | Narcity
Contributing Writer

I grew up in Ontario, which means there are a lot of things I assumed were just normal Canadian experiences – I would actually go as far as to say I assumed they were just normal North American things. Especially because I grew up in Toronto (what many call the U.S of Canada), I never questioned the way we operate here.

Until I started talking to people from anywhere else.

The more I learn about the rest of Canada, the more I realize Ontario is basically that one friend who keeps their Advil in the fridge, not in the medicine cabinet, because that's what their parents do (I'm that friend).

So, whether you're a tourist looking to assimilate into the culture or a Maritimer coming to laugh at your neighbours, here are some things that feel completely normal in Ontario but leave everyone else in Canada deeply confused.

#1. Bagged Milk

Let's start with the obvious one.

If you've lived in Ontario long enough, there's a good chance you've cut the corner off a plastic bag of milk after dropping it into a plastic pitcher.

Everyone else outside these borders, however, would feel like an archaeologist reading hieroglyphics watching this happen.

The best part of this is that our American neighbours make fun of Canadians for drinking bagged milk; meanwhile, they're really only making fun of Ontario's. Ontario accounts for the vast majority of bagged milk sales in Canada, while the rest of the country moved to cartons and jugs decades ago.

But you know what? Jokes on them, because I've been buying jugs of higher-protein milk recently instead of my usual bagged milk, and I can confirm that milk goes bad super fast. Milk lasts way longer in the bag.

#2. The Hydro

One of Ontarians' pastimes is complaining about their hydro bill. Little did I know that nobody calls it a hydro bill. Across the many seas and galaxies, it's referred to as "an electricity bill," or occasionally the "power bill," but never the hydro bill.

The strange part is that Ontario gets more than half of its electricity from nuclear energy, not hydroelectric dams. I'm not sure when we decided this, but somewhere through the eons, we all collectively agreed to call it hydro, and I don't think I can ever change.

#3. The driver's license process

You know the running joke about the DMV? It's a story as old as time: the DMV is slow, painful, endless, etc.

Ontario laughed a little too hard at that joke and decided to take it one step further. Here, we have to go to multiple organizations to get a license.

You go to ServiceOntario for one thing, and wait in an endless line.

Then you head over to DriveTest for something else, only to wait another eternity in some other line, holding another ticket that says V30IA2D, but they're only at DJAS375.

Here, you need two different pieces of paper from two different places, and nobody is entirely sure which location handles what until you're already standing in the wrong line.

Most provinces apparently manage licensing through a single, well-organized central system. Ontario said, double it.

#4. The Beer Store

Ontarions may love bureaucracy, but you know what we love more?

Beer.

I genuinely thought every province had The Beer Store. Then I learned that much of Canada can actually just buy beers from regular stores. For decades, Ontarians accepted that if you wanted a brew, you went to a dedicated store,

The fact that we all treated this as normal is honestly impressive.

Nothing says Ontario like standing in line with a 24-pack while carrying a garbage bag full of empties.

#5. Kindergarten

The school system is one of those things that, if you ask me, should be standardized. So why is it that at my grown age, I'm just finding out that not everyone has kindergarten the way we do?

For those of you outside the province, here you go to kindergarten for two years: Junior and Senior, or commonly referred to as JK and SK, and only after completing a whole two years may you graduate and enter the big bad world of grade 1.

But some provinces actually only have one year of kindergarten, or even more wild –none at all!

#6. Muskoka Chairs

What in the world is an Adirondack chair? If you're from Ontario, you're nodding along in silence, wondering the same thing.

If you're from anywhere else, you're reading this article, going, "What the heck is a Muskoka chair?"

Cottage culture is a universally enjoyed norm of Canadian culture, not unique to Ontario. And across the nation, you'll see a sea of oversized, colourful wooden chairs on every dock, patio, cottage deck, and brewery patio.

Ontarians will refer to these candyland-looking chairs as "Muskoka chairs" in reference to our beloved cottage town of Muskoka. Elsewhere, however, it would be referred to as an Adirondack chair.

My only question for the rest of you, then, is: what's an Adirondack?

#7. Catholic School

I'm about to confess something that I don't want anyone to hold against me.

Are you ready?

I grew up going to Catholic school. Not the kind with plaid skirts for uniforms and nuns or brothers as teachers. More like regular grade school, with regular teachers professionally certified with OCT, like all the rest, and publicly funded by the government, like any other public school.

The only difference was religion class every year and uniforms.

As I got older and spoke to more and more people in the city — specifically those who moved to this city from out of the province — and began explaining my school experience, I very quickly learned they had no idea these existed.

I'm not actually sure why we have publicly funded Catholic schools, and I'm not sure what the reaction would be from those of you outside these Ontarian borders, but from here, it's just a regular option.

The funny thing about growing up in Ontario is that none of these things feel unusual until someone from another province points them out.

To us, bagged milk, hydro bills, and trips to the Beer Store are just everyday life.

To everyone else in Canada, we might as well be operating our own strange little province-shaped universe.

The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Narcity Media.

  • Contributing Writer

    Lauren DiBenedetto (she/her) is a contributing writer for Narcity Media. She's a Toronto-based freelance writer covering arts and culture, dining, travel and city life. She studied English and Theatre at York University before completing her B.Ed., and later earned a master's degree in Literatures of Modernity from Toronto Metropolitan University. While her creative work spans many forms of writing, she is most interested in the people, places, and cultural movements that define the world around her.

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