The views expressed in this Opinion article are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Narcity Media.
You never think that you're going to be the parent receiving the heart-wrenching news that there is a possible shooter at your child's school — until it happens to you.
Thankfully, my family is safe and the situation turned out to be a terrifying false alarm, but so many others who go through this aren't as lucky.
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It started as a normal day in our house, rushing to finish everything before dropping the kids off at school. What began as a morning with some push and pull with my daughter and her storming off ended with me being grateful for my daughter being alive after I received a text from her telling me someone with a gun was spotted entering her school.
The school lockdown
I got a text around 10 a.m. from my teen daughter, saying, "I love you so much, mom."
I brushed it off and thought she was sorry about our little disagreement that morning, so replied with, "I love you more," and didn't think much else about it. Two minutes later she started to send one message after another.
"Mom, I'm sorry if I said or did anything that made you sad. Thank you for everything," one of them said. "Tell dad and my brother and sister how much I love them, I'm so proud of you," she said in the next.
That's when I started to panic because clearly, something was very wrong. I responded to her worrying texts, asking what was wrong but she wouldn't tell me at first. So, I turned to our local community group on Facebook for answers.
And there it was, a parent's worst nightmare — a rumour of an "active shooter" at her high school.
There was a lockdown. The street was closed. Even my other kids' school was in lockdown because of the situation. It felt like the world stopped for a few minutes, and my mind failed to comprehend the situation. I texted my daughter and asked her to please let me know what was happening.
It was less than a minute before I heard back from her, but for me, it felt like it was an eternity.
Finally, I received another text from her which confirmed the terrifying rumour that there was a possible shooter situation.
Texts from Karen's daughter. Karen Habashi | Narcity
My heart was racing so fast that I could hear the pounding in my ears. As a mom, I felt helpless. I needed to be with my daughter; I needed to hug her and calm her down.
The waiting was awful
My husband went to the school to stand outside and see what was going on. He told me that the school was surrounded by cops, SWAT teams and even the canine team.
Given the world that we live in and all of the heart-wrenching stories, my mind jumped to the worst-case scenario.
I sat on the ground and prayed that all the kids were safe. There were no updates from the school at that point, and the news said nothing, so the only information that I could find was from the local community group.
Rumours were flying left and right. I started to frantically refresh the group, reading every post and every comment. Parents were left in the dark.
Some parents posted stories they found on Snapchat of kids hiding and shaking under the desks. The classrooms were dark and silent in the videos. One video looked like it was right out of a movie.
The kids were all laying low, the classroom lights were dimmed and the police came in with their flashlights and guns.
As someone with anxiety and PTSD, I felt paralyzed. My mind and body seemed disconnected. I couldn't even stand up from the chair.
Part of me was triggered by living in Egypt previously, where I was often faced with church bombings, shootings and more terrifying incidents. I had forgotten that sense of fear after I moved to Canada.
At that point, I started crying and shaking uncontrollably. I felt angry and guilty at the same time. My daughter was in this situation, and I couldn't even do anything. My body and mind were betraying me, but I had to be strong for her.
I texted her every single second, and I hated the silence. Then she finally called me.
Hearing her voice was such a relief
I heard her voice saying, "Mommy, we're okay. The lockdown is over."
I felt my whole body crash.
My husband went to pick her up, and I went to the bathroom and kept throwing up. My body was in full fight-or-flight mode.
The lockdown lasted a little over an hour, but time ceased to exist that day. She walked through the door and we kept hugging. I didn't want to let go. I wanted to keep her safe. She was crying and was having a hard time even catching her breath.
Karen Habashi hugging her daughter. Karen Habashi | Narcity
"It's okay now, you're safe," my husband and I told her while hugging her.
The school later sent an email discussing what happened.
"The school acknowledges a decommissioned weapon was brought to Walnut Grove Secondary School by a staff member to be used as part of a history lesson and Remembrance Day related teachings. We regret the action and the impact that it has caused," it said.
I'm grateful for the quick response of the police and the school. I hope no one ever gets a scary text from their kids at school, even if it ends well — the fear the kids endured is still very real.
For now, we're moving forward and grateful for safety and strong gun laws that keep our kids safe.