I Asked ChatGPT How To Win A Specific Argument With My Girlfriend & It Actually Helped

The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Narcity Media.

ChatGPT is slowly but surely starting to run my life. At first, I only used the seemingly omnipresent AI to solve minor, left-brain issues in my life, grammar, spelling, and what have you.

But now I use it to solve my problems, period.

Last week, I used it to win an argument with my girlfriend, a woman who watches live court feeds all day long — and it worked!

She and I often clash about chores and when they should be done. My lady is a maximalist who accepts clutter with open arms and lives in an ocean of trinkets.

While I don't care about possessions at all — seriously, my cleaning routine before I met her was throwing everything out and starting again every time things got disorderly.

So, naturally, we bump heads a lot, and things can get heated and irrational, which is where the practical advice of our supercomputer overlord comes in handy.

Here are the three tips I got from ChatGPT.

Advice 1: Make a plan together

I know. It seems obvious, right? Well, I didn't think of it. So, whoops.

This strategy supplied by ChatGPT helped me defuse my partner's argument that I'm "too naggy." I am, by the way. But she's a procrastinator, so unless we work together, we'll both be stuck in messy room purgatory forever.

I, secretly the AI, contested that we devise a plan together and write it on a whiteboard last week. From there, I found out which chores annoyed her the least and offered to take those off her hands in exchange for her keeping our living room less chaotic.

Win-win.

Advice 2: Set deadlines.

You'd think being a writer would make me inherently better at hitting deadlines in my personal life. But, nope. Turns out, without structure, everything falls apart, which is why reminders are key.

When I told my girlfriend that we needed to have firm deadlines, as if I had come up with it and not a robot, she seemed a bit taken aback. Who was this mysterious figure making rational points in front of her? Surely, not her Patrick.

I think the weaker parts of us were secretly counting on being able to put off our listed responsibilities. So, having a non-negotiable date to stare at helped put a fire under our butts.

Advice 3: Show appreciation.

Who says machines don't have feelings? This helpful reminder from ChatGPT helped me beat my girlfriend in yet another argument by helping us avoid one altogether.

Everyone deserves to be showered with praise when they do something rad, but making our living room look beautiful, like the way she did, is worthy of a medal.

I wasn't unappreciative of her efforts before I merged with the internet, but this tip has definitely helped keep everyone's love tank full this past week.

Okay, I should wrap this whole piece up now. To be honest, I'm blanking. Let's ask ChatGPT:

"Cooperation and communication are key to creating a successful division of household chores. It's important to approach the situation with respect and a willingness to compromise," the AI software shared.

Thanks, buddy!